The Darkness Within
by Lady Lilybell
Summary: Everyone has darkness inside them. Some choose to fight against it and some embrace it. What happens when Ginny stops denying a part of herself and embraces the life Tom offered her 5 years ago. Takes place in Ginny's 6th year while the trio is away.
1. Chapter 1

Prologue 

Ginny Weasley had never been so mad in her entire life. She was tired of always being left out, over protected and babied. Everyone always said "Oh Ginny is easy, Ginny doesn't mind, Ginny is the baby she'll do whatever. Ginny won't say no." She was tired of never saying no, tired of letting everything slide off her back.

Her last year at Hogwart's had been eye opening. Mainly because she was the only weasley's and no " Golden Trio". She got to wear whatever she wanted and hang out with whomever she wanted. She had attracted a new gang and for the first time in her life she felt she had real friends.

With Dombledore gone and Snape as headmaster, most of the 7th year slytherins were death eater spies. Ginny had always walked a fine line between the light and dark. In her first year she was seduced by the dark side and she never really forgot it. But she was tired of walking that line and she let herself fall.

Mainly thanks to the mini skirts she wore she had caught the attention of Draco Malfoy , Blaise Zabini and by association Pansy Parkinson who actually turned out to be allot of fun. They started inviting her to their parties, She loved being able to let loose and flirt without Ron glaring at her. The best thing was that all she had to do is send letter home now and then pretending to be the good little girl her parents expected and they didn't know anything different. Ginny Weasley was finally becoming her own person.


	2. A New Ginny

Chapter 1

A New Ginny

" Ginny, Ginny ! Over here" Pansy waved frantically at her as she entered the great hall.

"Pansy, we sit here every day." She dropped her heavy bag on the ground and sat down. She winked at Blaise as his eyes rested on her exposed thigh as she lifted it over the bench.

His eyes darkened in lust. Sure Ginny thought he was cute but she had her eye on someone else.

" I know, but we have news !" Ginny's heart gave a jump, she was afraid it was news of Harry or her family. Ginny enjoyed hanging with the slytherins but she hadn't stopped caring for her family and friends.

"Good news ?" She asked nervously.

" Well that really depends on you."

" What do you mean ?"

" Its our family's turn to host the Christmas party this year and father said you could come !"

" Cool thanks, I really don't want to deal with my family, I'll just tell them I'm staying here."

" Ginny I don't think you understand, Its the annual Death Eater Ball" A surge of adrenaline mixed with fear and excitement took hold of her. She shifted in her seat.

"Really ? Are you sure its alright I come ?"

" Yes of course I'm always allowed to bring friends."

" OK, Umm I ...I don't have a ball gown." She said, her cheeks tinging red. She loved her parents but hated that they never had any money.

"Oh don't worry. I have a huge allowance. We'll go shopping together. It will be my christmas gift to you."

"Are you sure"

" I insist."

"Alright, Thank you"

* * *

Dear mum and dad,

How are you ? I'm fine. I am writing to tell you that I am planing on staying at Hogwarts this year over break. All my friends are because most of their parents are in hiding and they think its safer to stay here rather then risk having us followed home. I hope thats alright. I assumed it would be considering that you all are in hiding. Don't worry about me, I will be fine.

Stay safe, I love you all,

Ginny

She reread her letter and sent it off, confidant her parents will think its safer to stay at school. She was very excited, she was meeting Pansy in an hour to go dress shopping in Hogsmeade. She had never had a fancy dress before, she knew Pansy would help her find the perfect dress. She wanted it to be sexy but not overly so.

" Ginny, will you trust me ! Your have great breasts and the smallest waist ever, I'm so jealous." Pansy was handing Ginny all these dresses that she thought were to revealing.

"I don't want to look trashy pans."

"Ginny you won't. I wouldn't do that to you."

" Just out of curiosity how death eater oriented will this ball be ?" She asked nervously. This was serious, not just teenage junior death eaters anymore.

"Death Eaters will be there but they never discuss anything, they don't torture people for fun and nobody will lay a hand on you if thats what your worried about, the dark lord doesn't tolerate that."

"Oh ok... So He ...he will be there." That nervous, excited feeling took hold of her again. The mention of him but butterflies in her stomach.

"Did I tell you they found a way to restore him to his old self and let me tell you he is hot !"

Ginny gave a nervous chuckle "Yea I...I heard he was good looking as a young man."

"Here, this one try it on" Pansy handed her a full length red gown.

" Pansy I can't wear red"

" No, but this dress will look fabulous on you in dark green" Ginny smiled and hurried into the dressing room. When she came out and stood in front of the full length mirror the sales lady charmed it dark green.

"Ginny that has to be the one. You look great. Do you like it ?"

Ginny surveyed herself in the mirror. The dress was a v neck halter that criss crossed in the back, leaving much of her back exposed and had a small train. It hugged the curves she didn't even realize she had, and it did make her breasts look great with its accented waist.

" I do, I love it." Ginny lifted up her arm to look at the price tag but Pansy ripped it away from her before she could see it.

" How much is it Pansy ?"

"That doesn't matter." She turned to the sales witch "We'll take it."

* * *

Dear Ginny,

You can stay at school this year, though we will miss you. We won't really be able to celebrate anyway, its to dangerous for us all to be in one place. Have fun with your friends dear. We will send your gifts. Love,

Mum and Dad.

" They bought it" She announced as she crumpled the letter and took her seat.

"Great, We will leave tomorrow afternoon, the ball starts at 6, we can get ready in my room."

" Can't wait"

" You will save me a dance won't you love ?" Blaise asked leaning in close to her.

" I'm sure we can work something out."

"Tease, Come on Draco lets play chess." He grabbed his bag and left. Before Draco followed him he leaned down to Ginny's ear .

" If he gets a dance, I want one too." Ginny pulled his arm bring his ear closer to her mouth.

"As slytherin quidditch captain I'm sure you know as Gryffindor captain I have my own room too. The portriat to the right of the fat lady, password is lioness. Be there at midnight and I may let you have more then a dance." She leaned up and kissed him. "Don't tell Blaise" Draco smirked and left the room.

Ginny looked over at Pansy, who was smirking at her.

" What ? I wanna know if the rumors are true. Don't tell me you never had a go at him."

" No, go for it. I'm just happy they are true. And I have to say I love this new Ginny Weasley." They both laughed.

" I'm not a new Ginny, I'm just acting myself for once"

" Well I better go, I haven't even started my potions essay. I expect to hear details about your little rendezvous with Draco tonight."

"Of course. I plan on shagging him senseless." She said wriggling her eyebrows. Pansy hurried off as Ginny collected her belongings and made her way back to her room to get ready for Draco.

She showered, cleaned up and slipped into a nightgown that fell just above her knees with lace trim and spaghetti. She sat on her bed to read while she waited for him.

Ginny was awoken by the feel of soft lips on hers. She smiled and moaned without opening her eyes. The warm lips traveled down to her neck and suckled gently on her pulse point.

"Wake up love" He whispered in her ear then she finally opened her eyes.

" I fell asleep, I'm sorry"

"It's alright. You looked so sexy laying there I couldn't resist kissing you." She ran her hands up his chest, under his shirt lifting it over his head.

"Merlin I've wanted to do this for so long." His hand crept up her tight and touched her lace panties feeling her wetness.

" Someone's been waiting for me." He smirked against her neck. She pulled away from him and remover her nightie.

"I'm not going to wait much longer" She said and she scooted back on the bed and opened her legs. He got up and removed the rest of his clothes before moving between her legs.

" Are you sure about this ?" Ginny gave a little chuckle

"I'm not a virgin Draco. But we need to agree, This is a one time thing OK" He looked taken aback.

"Your surprised ?" She asked.

"Your brothers never left you alone I' surprised you found the time to lose it. And friends with benefits happens to be my specialty. Just ask Pansy." She made a face at the mention of her friend but he entered two fingers into her and she arched her back off the bed.

" Oh Mer...lin " She moaned.

"After tonight, I'm going to be the only one you think of." He entered her in once swift thrust.

* * *

" Oh Merlin Draco that was bloody fantastic !" She said as they both reached their climax. Draco collapsed on the bed beside her, breathing heavily.

" Where the bloody fuck did you learn that Weasley ?"

Ginny just laughed as she pulled herself off the bed and wrapped herself in her silk robe.

" Come back over here, I'll cast a contraceptive spell on you."

"You don't need to, I'm on muggle birth control."

"Why ?"

" Not that its really your business but the spell can easily be forgotten and I didn't want my parents knowing I asked my healer for a potion. Are you staying ?"

"Do you want me to ?" She climbed back on the bed and snuggled up to him.

"As long as I can use you as a pillow" A few minutes later they were both asleep.

~~~~~~~~I couldn't stop myself from starting this new story before I finished at least one of the others but Oh Well hope you like it. Please read and review !~~~~~~~~~


	3. A Lioness among Serpents

Chapter 2

A lioness among serpents

"Merlin Pansy if I'd known he was that good I would have jumped him a long time ago." Ginny was at Parkinson manor getting ready for the ball in Pansy's room.

" I told you. And he has no problem playing friends with benefits."

" He told me that, But I thought you were shagging Blaise."

" I am, I haven't shagged Draco in a long time. I think I may actually have feelings for Blaise now. But I know he likes you."

" No he doesn't Pans, I can tell he just wants a go at me. But I'm not interested. Will you zip me up ?" She asked turned her back.

" Do you think he may have feelings for me ?"

" I'm not sure, I haven't spent as much time with him as I have Draco. But I think he could, and when he sees you in that dress..."

* * *

Ginny was extremely nervous as she entered the ball with Pansy an hour later. She was introduced to several people and was forced to assure one person after another that she did not share her family's view and yes she was THAT Ginevra Weasley.

Pansy and Ginny made their way to the table that Draco and Blasie were seated at.

"Well ladies you look amazing" Draco said as they approached. Blaise's jaw nearly hit the floor at the sight of Pansy in her red low cut dress. He scrambled to his feet and pulled out a chair for Pansy as she smiled and blushed like crazy.

" You nervous ?" Draco asked Ginny after everyone was seated.

" Its Ok Ginny, everyones nervous meeting the Dark Lord for the first time." Pansy chimed in.

" I'm not nervous, and I've met him before."

" What ? " Draco asked.

" When ?" Blaise added.

Ginny forgot that it was not public knowledge that it was she who opened the chamber in her first year.

" I was the one who opened the chamber in my first year. Lucius gave me Tom's diary, we became friends." She left out the part about him trying to kill her. Only Ginny knew the truth about what happened, Only Tom knew that she loved him.

" That was you ?"

" Yea, but I don't want to talk about it." She said as her eyes swept across the ball room searching.

" He's not here yet. Believe me, When he arrives, You'll know." Blaise said.

" He doesn't know you're here. Think he'll recognize you ?" Pansy asked.

"I don't know, He hasn't seen me since I was 11, but the red hair is unmistakable."

A moment later the room fell silent and the big wooden doors swung open. Ginny couldn't see Tom but knew he had made his entrance because as the figure walked by, each of the death eaters sunk into a bow. Ginny's heart was pounding in her ears with nervous excitement.

She was finally able to see him when he took his seat at the head table with the Parkinson's and the Malfoy's on either side. To Ginny's surprise, there was not speech or big scene made. A moment later the food was served.

" They never talk business here. We'll eat and then the table's will be moved to the sides for dancing. Its just like a regular ball really." Pansy explained.

"This food is incredible." Ginny commented after consuming a large meal.

"I can't wait for the dancing to start." Ginny said excitedly, She knew Draco and Blaise were great dancers but she was really hoping to catch Tom's eye.

When the tables were moved Draco was the first to ask Ginny to dance.

" Your a wonderful dancer, Draco"

"I'm wonderful at many things." He said smirking.

" Eh" She said teasing.

"Oh really, Care to have another go ?" He leaned in and kissed her right below her ear, She could feel his breath on her neck.

Before she could answer he had taken her hand and started walking her toward the door that led out into the gardens.

"Draco we can't here."

"Don't worry, I know what I'm doing. You look so delicious tonight." He led her to a secluded spot where the hedges were so tall that they would be sheltered from view. The air smelt of roses even though it was winter and Draco cast a warming charm on the area.

Draco slowly walked over to were she was sitting on a small stone bench. He sat down and then pulled her onto his lap. They made out for several minutes while Draco's hand made its way up her dress. She gasped when he pushed the thin fabric of her panties aside and slide a finger into her. Feeling how wet she was he then added another. He trust his hand in and out as she moaned into his mouth. He trailed kisses down her neck as she raised her hips to meet his hand.

"Oh merlin Draco" She moaned throwing her head back in pleasure.

" That's it baby, cum for me." As she let his words wash over her, her muscles tightened around his fingers. Draco pulled her into another deep kiss to keep her from screaming as her orgasm hit. They finally broke apart and he removed his fingers from her. Surveying his fingers covered in her arousal he brought them to his lips and licked them clean.

" Delicious" He said before pulling her back into a kiss and allowing her to taste herself on his tongue. After a few minutes Ginny pulled away trying to catch her breath.

" Thanks" She stood up, righted her clothes, cast a cleansing spell on herself and went back to the party, leaving and extremely aroused Draco in the garden.

Ginny was dancing with Blaise when Draco came storming up to her.

" What the hell was that Weasley ?" He growled in her ear scaring her a bit. To be fair they all had been drinking for the better part of the night, Ginny was sure if she had not been drunk she would not have let Draco do what he did in the garden.

" Sorry, Draco I'm dancing with Blaise now."

" You left me hanging, nobody leaves me hanging" He explained slightly slurring his words. Blaise took that as his cue to leave.

"Draco I was dancing with him !" Draco grabbed her hand and started to pull her out of the room but she resisted.

"Draco stop..."

" Come on honey I need you..."

" Mr. Malfoy ! I believe the lady said no" A voice came from behind them. Draco's face paled as he turned and saw Tom. He quickly bowed, mumbled an apology and left.

" Ginevra Weasley " Tom said in half astonishment. Ginny gave him a half smile and curtsied.

"M'Lord"

"I must confess some confusion when I saw red hair sweeping around the dance floor with Slitherins."

" I don't wish to be judged by my family any longer."

" I'm glad to hear it. I haven't ever forgotten about you."

" I haven't either." She said slightly blushing.

" Let's take a walk in the garden." Before she could answer he had linked her arm with his and led her to the door.

" You're nervous." He said after they had been walking for awhile.

" A little"

" So tell me, how did you come to be here ?"

" I uh, Well I had heard that you were back to ...to..."

" My younger self." He finished.

"Yea, I just, I wanted to see. I got tired of trailing after my brother. Pansy became a good friend. I got tired of denying part of myself."

" How old are you now Ginevra ?"

" 16"

" You're very beautiful, I always said you would be." Ginny blushed.

"What ?" He coaxed " Didn't I always say you would be ?" He teased.

" Yes" She answered quietly. Tom stopped walking turned her to face him, not letting go of her hand he took hold of her other as well, interlacing their fingers and pulled her towards him.

"Tom" He said.

" What ?"

"Say, Yes Tom." He smiled.

" Yes, Tom"

" Are you involved with the Malfoy boy ? What was he harassing you about ?"

" We aren't involved." She mumbled, blushing.

They started walking again.

" You know, I already know." He said smirking at her.

" What ?"

" I'm very skilled at legitimency." Her face immediately turned as red as her hair and she stopped walking.

" We...We were drinking, I...we..." She said looking very embarrassed.

" It's alright," He shrugged. He walked really close to her.

"You had a need, and you found someone to satisfy it." He leaned in really close to her ear.

"I just hope next time, I can be the one to satisfy it for you." He said before leaning in and kissing her. Ginny's mind was reeling. It was the best kiss she'd ever had.

" We should go back inside" He said after he released her.

please read and review !!!!


	4. Losing Control

Losing Control

Ginny nervously followed the small house elf through the halls of the unknown manor she had been apperated to. An hour ago she had been woken up at Parkinson Manor by the elf saying she had to be ready to leave for an important meeting. At first she was scared but Pansy told her to go, and that she wouldn't regret it if she did.

Now here she was being led into a large dining room with a table laid with every type of breakfast food imaginable. She sat down in the appointed chair, her stomach growling as she inhaled the aroma wafting from the table.

She was contemplating picking something to nibble on while she waited when the door opened and to her surprise Tom walked in. She immediately stiffened in her chair as he walked around the table and took the seat at the head, just to her right.

She watched closely as he sat down without saying anything. She felt as though his sexy dark eyes were intense enough to burn right through her, when she suddenly realized that he was trying to use legitamency on her. However after dating Harry Potter it had become second nature to her practice occlumency, which she was very skilled at, better then Harry.

Ginny shifted nervously under his gaze and for reasons she couldn't explain, she blushed.

" So you did date Potter" He leaned back in his chair as he finally spoke.

" I..I..We ...um...yes" She answered.

" I thought so, I can't read your thoughts. I assume he taught you occlumency."

"Yes sir"

" You're not to use against me again, understood ?"

Ginny furrowed her eyebrows and opened her mouth to yell before she remembered who she was speaking to and promptly closed it. She looked over to see Tom smirking at her.

"You were about to yell at me" It wasn't a question.

" I apologize sir, I should .." He raised a hand to silence her.

" I remember your temper love. I know you like to be in control, So do I." Ginny pretended to be looking around the room to avoid the intensity of his gaze.

" Please help yourself" Ginny didn't have to be asked twice as she piled her plate with all her favorite foods as he did the same.

They ate in silence for several minutes, Ginny was searching for something, anything to say but she came up short.

" Your staying with the Parkinson's until break is over ?" Ginny looked up from her food, wondering why he asked a question he already knew the answer to.

" Because I want to invite you to stay here." He said, obviously having read her thoughts.

" St...Stay here ?"

" Yes, I want you here. Asking was just a courtesy, We both know you'll stay."

" I...Umm yes, I'd be delighted. Would you mind telling me exactly where here is Sir."

"Tom"

"Tom" She repeated quietly.

" We are in Malfoy Manor" Ginny was surprised to hear that and wondered if Draco was here.

" He is, After breakfast I will escort you to your room and give you a tour."

" Thank you ...Tom" She smiled softly at him.

After eating all they wanted, Tom rose from his chair and helped Ginny out of hers. He offered her his arm as he escorted her to a guest bedroom. Ginny was very thankful she had become close with Draco or being in his home would have been incredibly awkward. Tom opened the door to a very beautiful bedroom, Much to Ginny's surprise her things had already been moved from Pansy's. The bedroom was decorated in rich purples, reds and blues. Ginny had always heard that Narsissa Malfoy had amazing taste.

" That door there" Tom said pointing to a door on the left. " Is your private bathroom. To the right is your closet."

" Thank you, It's beautiful" Ginny said gazing out of the big picture window that overlooked a small pond. Ginny was startled when she felt Tom run his hands up her arms. She had not even heard him walk over to her. Her shoulders tensed visibly. He gently turned her to face him.

" Don't be scared" He said quietly. Ginny shuffled her feet and inclined her head slightly.

" I'm not scared of you Tom" She said a little defiantly

Tom moved his hands from her shoulders, down her arms and held both her hands in his.

" Good, You are the only one who is allowed the honor...of not being scared of me." He finished with a smirk.

Ginny gave a nervous chuckle " Well, I'm honored" He was looking directly into her eyes, she kept his gaze for a moment before looking away.

Tom's gaze was intense, filled with lust and passion, just being near him gave her butterflies. Tom was playing with her fingers, tracing the palm of her hand with his fingers. Everywhere he touched seemed to tingle at the contact.

They stared for a few more minutes before he pulled her forward slightly, crashing her body into his, pulling her into a searing kiss that she felt all over. He moved his hands up her arms and rested them on both sides of her neck as he deepened the kiss. After a moment he trailed a line of fiery kisses down her neck, as he did so, he spun her around and walked her backwards toward the bed. She laid down, pulling him along with her. Just as his hand was creeping up her leg to caress her thigh there was a knock at the door.

He planted one last searing kiss on her pink swollen lips before standing up and straightening his clothes. Ginny seemed to be unable to move. To shocked from what had just happened and breathing heavily. Her hair was tousled and her legs were slightly parted with her black skirt risen slightly up her thighs. She didn't have time to compose herself before Tom threw the door open in a huff.

Draco was startled to see Tom answer the door, having obviously expected it to be Ginny. His eyes shifted from Tom to Ginny, who quickly scrambled off the bed blushing. Draco Smirked at her before realizing that Tom was glaring at him.

" My apologies, I merely sought to greet Ms Weasley and make sure she..."

" She has everything she needs Mr. Malfoy, I'm sure Ms. Weasley appreciates your concern." The two seemed to be having some sort of staring contest. Ginny didn't speak, her eyes darted between them, praying that Tom was not seeing Draco's memory of their night together.

" Very well, M'lord. Sorry for the ... interruption." With one last pointed look at Ginny he spun on his heels and left.

Ginny's face burned with embarrassment as she buried her face in her hands.

" Merlin that was so embarrassing." She mumbled.

" He wasn't surprised" Tom said closing the door and turning back to her.

" What ?" Ginny asked confused, running her fingers through her messy hair.

" I was reading his thoughts, his face may have looked surprised but do you really want to know what he was thinking ?" He asked moving closer to her.

"Um no actually, I don't think I do." She said her face turning brighter as she turned away from him.

" Don't hide that beautiful face." He said from behind her, She turned around to speak to him.

" So you were gonna show me around."

" I'd much rather stay here, and pick up were we left off." He said slipping his hands around her waist and playing with the hem of her shirt.

Ginny could feel his fingers skimming over the flesh of her stomach. She unconsciously arched into his touch and allowed him to pull her flush up against him. With every breath she took her breasts brushed against his chest.

" I find it very hard to control myself around you Ginevra." One of his arms was around her waist the other was on her neck, as if he were going to pull her into a kiss at any moment and how she wished he would.

" How said you have to ?" She said in barely a whisper.

" I do, Because I'm the Dark Lord, And I'm always in control."

" You need to loosen up" She said moving over to the bed, reaching under her skirt she removed her pink lace panties and tossed them on the bed.

" You little vixen" He growled before starting over to her, Just then a white silvery bear came in throw the window.

" What now !" He yelled

" M'lord, sorry for the interruption but we have a situation." Said the deep menacing voice of a death eater Ginny didn't recognize before dissolving a moment later.

Tom looked at her for a moment, obviously not quite sure what to say.

" It's ok, Go" She said reaching for her panties. Tom quickly snatched them up and stuffed them in his pocket first.

" For later, Don't replace them." Was all he said before apperating away.

Ginny sat there a moment before getting up.

" Yea, like I'm gonna walk around without panties on" She said rolling her eyes and finding her clothes already in the drawers.

She didn't care if he got mad, It was cold and she wasn't gonna walk around with out anything under her skirt. She wasn't sure what she was supposed to do, She hadn't gotten her tour and wasn't sure if she was allowed to wander just anywhere. She really didn't wish to run into any death eaters or see things she shouldn't.

Ginny stuck her head out her door and looked up and down the hallway. It was ornately decorated with several doors just like hers lining the walls.

" Draco !" She whispered before tip toeing out. She walked down the hall a bit and called again.

" Draaacccoo" She kept walking, turning down so many other halls that she wouldn't be able to find her way back to her room even if she tried. The place was silent, Ginny was not used to a quite house. The burrow was never quiet and neither was Hogwart's.

" Great, now I'm lost" She said out loud to herself. She kept walking and eventually she came to the end of a hallway that had a large bay window over looking the grounds.

" This place is amazing." she mumbled to herself.

" Lost Ginny ?" Came a familiar voice behind her, snapping her out of her trance. She turned and saw draco, She sighed in relief.

" Draco, you scared me. I got lost. How did you know I was here ?"

" One of the paintings heard you calling me and told me where you were. What are you doing ?"

" I don't know, What am I supposed to be doing ? I don't know what I'm allowed to do or where I can go."

" You can go anywhere, you can do whatever you want. You've been brought here, so you will be able to apperate back."

"Oh, Ok. Well what are you doing right now ?"

" I was doing my potions essay, maybe you should be doing the same" he said with a smirk.

" Oh yea, I ...I forgot about it. I guess I will start on that."

" I guess its easy to forget with the Dark Lords hand up your skirt."

Ginny punched him on the shoulder " Shut up, may I remind you just a few days ago it was your hand" She hissed.

" Hey" He put his hands up in defeat. " I didn't say it was a bad thing."

" If you hadn't of interrupted us ..."

" I didn't know you would jump him that fast." He said, cutting her off.

" I didn't jump him" She said looking offended.

" I was just teasing you, Come on lets go work on that essay. The Dark Lord will be busy for the rest of the day anyway." He said offering her his arm. She took it and followed him to the library.


	5. Date Night or something like it

Chapter 4

Date night

Ginny didn't see the dark lord for the rest of the day. The next morning her breakfast was set on her table when she woke up. She slipped on her robe and read on her window seat while she enjoyed a warm cinnamon scone. A few moments later there was a knock at the door, assuming it was Draco she yelled for him to come in without looking up from her book.

" Good morning" Tom said. When Ginny realized it was him she scrambled nervously to her feet sending her book onto the floor with a loud thump.

" Uh G...Good morning." She noticed Tom's shoulders tense as he took a deep breath.

" You thought I was Draco." he said.

" Only because I assumed you wouldn't knock, I thought you would just apperate in." Ginny said with all the confidence she could muster.

" It's not proper to enter a lady's room without invitation." He said stiffly.

" There isn't anything going on between Draco and I." She said

" Anymore" He added causing her to blush. Tom's expression softened.

" What are you reading, The dictionary" He said walking forward and picking up her book.

" It's Anna Karenina, By Leo Tolstoy." She said.

" Its huge, It will take you a year to read this." Ginny shrugged.

" Maybe, I love it. It's brilliant. I love to read."

" Well" He said taking a seat at the small table where her breakfast was set. " When you finish you will have to tell me about it."

" Or you could read it yourself" She offered.

Tom smirked at her. " If only I had to time for such things Ginevra" Ginny blushed under his stare.

"Please, sit, finish your breakfast." Tom said pouring himself a cup of tea. Ginny sat in the seat across from him nervously and began picking at her scone again.

" What did you and Draco do yesterday ?" Tom asked suddenly.

" I...we...He just helped me with my potions essay. Thats all."

" Ah yes, must keep up your school work." He said sarcastically. Ginny wasn't sure if she should defend herself or not, His tone sounded as if he didn't believe her.

" Have dinner with me tonight" It wasn't a question, Tom never took his eyes from Ginny's. The intensity of his gaze made her blush.

" You mean, like ... a date ?" She asked timidly.

" I don't date Ginevra" He answered hastily. " However..." He added sensing her hurt feelings. " I suppose if I did this would be considered one."

" Oh umm ok."

" Do you have proper attire ?" Ginny blushed a little.

" Well, um where...where exactly are we going ?"

" Well obviously we can't go to diagon ally Ginevra. However Dinner will be prepared in the formal dinning room tonight. Take this" He placed a bag of gold on the table. " Get Pansy to help you pick something."

Tom got up to leave before Ginny spoke again.

" I don't need your money." Tom turned and looked at her. Raking his eyes over her worn out pajamas.

" Of course you don't, but I want you to have it. Be ready by 7" He said before leaving her.

Ginny took the bag an dumped the money on the table. Counting it out, she couldn't imagine the type of dress she would need 1000 galleons for. Shrugging it off and assuming Pansy would know she went to shower and dress for the day.

" Pansy I refuse to try on another dress you pick out, they are far to ... you, not me" Ginny said as Pansy pulled her into yet another dress shop.

" Ginny he likes you ok, do you think he just dates anyone. Why do you refuse to show off what you have."

" Because I don't dress like that ok. I don't want to give the wrong impression."

" Ugh Ginny your so up tight, which I don't understand because of what you did with Draco the other night." Ginny's cheeks flushed.

" He told you ?"

"Gin, Draco tells me everything. Don't worry."

After about an hour, Ginny picked a black sleeveless cocktail dress with a gold zipper from the v neck to just below her cleavage. Pansy assured her that there is no way it would accidentally unzip without help. Ginny thought it looked simple and elegant.

After eating lunch at a nearby pub they departed so Ginny could nap, shower and get ready for dinner.

When 7 came around, Ginny had her hair up in a loose bun with ringlets hanging down. Her makeup was done and her shoes were on but she didn't know where to go, so she waited. A few minutes later a house elf popped in and took her down to the dinning room.

Ginny sat in the dinning room waiting for Tom to show up. The house elf had brought her some wine and she sipped it nervously as she waited.

After another 15 minutes food appeared on her plate, confused but starving she decided to eat. She felt stupid eating alone in a dress that cost more then the rest of her wardrobe put together. After she finished her meal desert appeared, Deciding not to sit alone any longer she pushed her plate away and stomped off to her room.

Pissed off that if was only 8 o'clock and she was alone in a fancy dress she took it off, through it on the floor and drew herself a bath filled to the top with lavender scented bubbles. She pulled out her favorite muggle magazine she had brought with her and slipped into the water.

Her hair up in a messy bun and bubbles up to her neck, she leaned back and started to read an article entitled " Your breasts called and they're being ignored" She laughed at the title as she began to read.

Just as she was getting to the good parts, she heard a knock at her bedroom door. Pissed off that she had been stood up, she decided to ignore it. The was another knock, this time louder.

" Ginevra ?" Certain she did not want to talk to him she remained in the bath.

The next knock was directly on the bathroom door, Ginny wasn't surprised that he had let himself in but was confident he would not barge into the bathroom.

" Ginevra if you don't come out, I'm coming in." Letting out a huff of frustration, she got out and wrapped a towel around herself before opening the door.

" Yes" She crossed her arms in front of her, She couldn't help but notice Tom's eyes on her cleavage so she pushed past him and grabbed he robe.

" What do you want Tom ? I was trying to relax." She did not let her hard expression falter under his gaze.

"I wanted to explain."

"Don't bother. I was stupid to think that this could work." She refused to look at him as she went to her dresser and picked out her pajamas.

"This can work, Something came up."

"And you didn't even send a note, you just didn't show up. I need someone who will actually think about me and my feelings."

" I do"

" No you don't, if you did you would have sent a message. Look, I'm not stupid, I know your busy and have allot of world domination shit going on but I want someone who will make me a priority. Now if you will excuse me I want to go to sleep, I have to head back to school in the morning." She walked over to the door and held it open for him.

He stood there stunned for a moment, Nobody ever talked to him that way. He wasn't entirely sure why he hadn't yelled at her for it. He made to leave but hesitated as he stood in front of her. He wanted to kiss her but was pretty sure it would earn him a slap.

"I'll make it up to you, promise." He said before exiting.

**Sorry for taking so long to update, and I'm sorry this is so short but I'm using this chapter as a transition to get back in the swing of things.**


	6. Possession

Chapter 5

Ginny's port key back to school was scheduled for early the next morning. She didn't have time for breakfast and she was not surprised when Tom didn't show up to see her off. Make it up to her indeed, How was he supposed to do that when he couldn't show his face around school.

Right before her scheduled departure there was a knock at her door. Rolling her eyes she opened it, but it was not Tom.

" oh its you"

" lovely to see you too darling" Draco replied.

" Sorry, I didn't mean that. I'm heading back to school, don't have much time."

" I know, I'm going with you." He said entering the room and pulling his trunk behind him.

After Ginny unpacked her belongings she still had time to make it to the great hall for breakfast before her first class. Most of the students had already cleared out so she sat alone reflecting on the events that transpired over break. They had not gone as well as she had hoped. But she figured she would have to get used to Tom being called away unexpectedly, She wondered if she was ready for the type of relationship she was seeking with him.

" Ms Weasley" She was pulled out of her thoughts by professor Mcgonagall.

" Yes professor ?"

" The head girl was recently caught engaging in behavior unbecoming of head girl."

" Really ? What happened ?" Ginny blurted out before she could squash her curiosity.

" Sorry Professor, go on."

" Yes well anyway she has been stripped of her title and we have decided you will take her place."

" Me ? thank you professor."

" Your welcome, I trust you will not make us regret this decision. You will move into your private room after todays classes. Now off you go before your late." She turned on her heel and left the great hall before Ginny could thank her again.

Ginny didn't really wanna spread the word that she had been made head girl because she didn't know the details of why Marietta had been ousted. After a long day of classes Ginny moved her things into the head girls room. Thankfully Marietta had already been moved out so there was no awkward interaction between the two of them.

Ginny had never been in the heads room before but she was very excited to have a common room as well. The room wasn't big, it had a four poster bed along the far wall. A window over looking the grounds with a seat. Ginny was looking forward to spending time there reading. To the right was a desk and a small book shelf. On the right, next to what she assumed was the bathroom door was a dresser. The room had turned itself to Gryffindor colors when she had entered.

Ginny looked around the bathroom, gold fixtures, large bath tub Ginny was sure she would be spending alot of time in. After she had settled in she went to take a shower. When she re-entered her room there was a note on the bed.

She crossed to it, a towel wrapped around her body and her red hair falling in wet strands on her shoulders. She picked it up to read it.

"_Your Welcome" _Ginny flipped it over but there was nothing else written. She didn't know what it meant or who wrote it. Just then there was a knock at the door.

" Who is it ?" she called.

" Draco" She looked down at herself but decided she didn't care that she was in a towel and opened the door.

" Draco, how did you get in here ?"

" I'm head boy, we share the common room, my room is just over there." He pointed across the common room to a door that looked just like Ginny's.

" Oh right, I forgot."

" Congrats on your new position, You must be the first 6th year to ever make head girl."

" I think it has something to do with the lack of options in the 7 year class."

" True, can you imagine Pansy as head girl ?" Draco laughed.

" Do you want to come in ?" Ginny said stepping aside.

" No, its ok. I have work to do, Just wanted to see how you are settling in."

" Oh well thanks" Draco turned to leave.

" Hey wait a sec, Do you know anything about this note ?" She handed him the card.

" Your Welcome, its not signed."

" No shit sherlock, thats why I asked."

" Calm down, I don't know what it means, but it seems like someone is taking credit for your new status." Draco handed her back the card and walked back to his room.

Ginny's school work and head girl duties had taken over her life, so much so that she didn't have time to wonder about the note anymore. She thought it would be a blast now that she basically had her own common room, Draco wouldn't object to entertaining some of the other Slytherins. But there simply was not time and every night after finishing her homework she was usually to exhausted to even care that she didn't have much down time.

Ginny was so happy to hear that a hogsmeade weekend was fast approaching. She had been working so hard the thought of shopping with Pansy and having a few butter beers with her friends was just what she needed.

Ginny was studying late one night in the library when Dean Thomas approached her, without saying a word he sat down next to her uninvited.

"Hey Ginny"

" Oh Hey Dean." She shifted uncomfortably in her seat, she had not spoken to him once this year. She thought he would probably lecture her about her choice of friends recently.

" Congrats on being head girl."

" Thanks, How have you been ?"

" I'm good, I miss hanging out with you."

" Me too, Sorry. I assumed you would lecture me for befriending some of the Slytherins."

" They aren't all bad, you have the right to choose new friends. Just wish you wouldn't forget your old ones."

Ginny opened her mouth to defend herself but she knew deep down she had neglected to maintain her old friendships when she started hanging out with Pansy and the rest.

" I'm sorry Dean. I never meant to do that."

" Its ok, what do you say to going to Hogsmeade with me ? Just as friends, we can catch up, shop and get a butter beer."

" Sure, that sounds nice. Thanks Dean. Most of my old friends kinda wrote me off when I started to hang with Pansy."

" I know, but I also know that your brother was a big pain in the ass to you, so I understand the need to make your own choices of who you hang out with. Just be careful yea ?"

" I will. I'll meet you in the great hall at 10 on saturday."

" Great, I'll let you get back to work."

Ginny sat there for a moment before deciding to call it a night and heading back to her room.

On saturday morning Ginny woke up and got ready for the trip to hogsmeade. She met Dean like they planned and headed out for some shopping. They bought some sweets at honeydukes and browsed are the book store as well as the apothecary before heading to the three broomsticks for lunch.

"I'm really glad you asked me to come with you Dean, and I'm really sorry we haven't hung out as much."

" Thanks gin, I appreciate that and I understand your going through something. I Just want to make sure you are alright, I mean the people you are hanging with are not innocent."

" I know, I'll be careful. I've dated Harry, he taught me a few things."

They finished their meal, took a walk to the shrieking shack and headed back up to the castle before it got dark.

"Thanks for today Dean."

" No problem Ginny, I'll see you in class." With that Ginny made her way back to her room to finish up some left over homework.

The next morning when heading to breakfast Ginny heard a commotion coming from down the hall. She saw Dean being helped out of the portrait hole by Seamus and Collin.

"Whats happened ?" Ginny asked.

" We aren't sure, He woke up screaming. Says he body felt like it was on fire, then he passed out." Collin explained.

" I'll run ahead and warn madam Pompfry." Ginny took of running towards the hospital wing. When dean arrived she had a bed all ready for him as well as several potions. Ginny had to go the rest of the day without knowing what had happened because she promptly shooed them all away before administering treatment.

Of course rumors echoed through the whole school. From what Ginny could gather there were no arguments, or fights, no suspicious people seen entering or exiting the common room.

Ginny went back to her room to drop off her books, she planned to go visit Dean, after being unconscious for a few hours,he had finally woken up, She was determined to not let their friendship be neglected again. She went and freshened up but when she went to open her bedroom door to leave she couldn't open it.

"What the hell" She jiggled the handle and pulled but the door would not budge.

"Come on you bloody piece of shit. Let me the fuck out of here" She yelled and yelled but knew nobody would here her for hours, Draco was at quidditch practice.

" Ugh" She grabbed her wand and shot every spell she could think of but to her udder bewilderment they all bounced right out without leaving a mark.

" What the bloody hell is going on here ?" She yelled out loud to herself.

" Is that any way for a lady to talk ?"

Ginny wiped around in surprise to see Tom standing by her window.

" What the hell are you doing here ?" She asked in surprised with her hand on her heart.

" You scared the shit out of me !"

" Language my dear. Is that any way to thank me." He said gesturing to her room.

" Huh ?"

" Oh do catch up Ginevra" He said in an agitated voice.

" What did you do to the head girl ?" Ginny asked suspiciously.

"She wasn't harmed. I thought you would enjoy your own room."

" Uh, I had my own room as quidditch captain." Ginny said with her back against her door, she was rooted at the spot out of shock from seeing Tom in the castle.

" I wanted you away from gryffindor tower."

" Why exactly ?"

" Ginevra stop asking question, this was a gift. I told you I would make it up to you. Now you hold the highest honor that can be bestowed upon a student."

" Not by merit." She argued.

" I didn't make them appoint you. Now I took time out of my busy night to discuss a few things with you." He said taking off his cloak an laying back on her bed with his hands resting behind his head. Ginny could not help but notice how good he looked in his tailored black suit. He must have been reading her thoughts because a smirk appeared on his face.

" Stop that ! Did you seal my door ?"

"I had to make sure you would be here when I arrived."

" Well You can stay till I get back I need to check on someone."

" He will be fine."

" What ?"

" Your not to see him again."

" Excuse me ? You have no right to...Wait did you do this to him ?"

" Don't over react"

"Answer me !" She yelled

" Do not yell at me Ginevra. You are not to fraternize with other men like a common tramp." Ginny was pacing now, her temper building.

" Common tramp ? Tom he's just a friend and you have no right to..."

"I have every right." He snapped jumping up from the bed and moving towards her, she took an instinctive step back.

" Now, I arranged this meeting to clarify a few things with you. You are not to accept dates with other men, you are not to be alone with any other men besides myself. I will know Ginny, rest assured I will find out if you embarrass me."

" Embarrass you ? Tom, what exactly do you mean by that ? It's not like we are a normal couple." She said hands on hips.

" All in good time love, but for now I need to make sure you remain faithful to me."

" Well what about you ? Do I get to threaten you and hurt your friends if I want to."

" You wouldn't hurt a fly. But you will just have to trust me." Without warning he reached out and grabbed her left wrist and clamped a gold band on it.

"What the fuck are you ?" She trailed off after he threw her arm back at her setting her stumbling back on her bed.

" That my dear is how I will know, and how you will know when you are engaging in inappropriate behavior."

" What do you mean how will I know ?"

" Try going against my wishes and see, but I assure you, you will regret it."

" Ugh thats barbaric, don't you trust me ?" She said as she tried to pull the bracelet off.

" I do, Its the others I don't trust. I don't share."

"I'm not a possession, You ass, and right now I can't even look at you for hurting Dean and for treating me this way, I would appreciate it if you left."

" I'm only trying to protect you."

" From Dean ! He never laid a hand on me and you put him in the hospital wing !"

" Ok I'll admit I overreacted. I had planned for us to spend some time together this evening will you stop scowling ?"

" No, I don't want to spend time with you, I want to go visit with my injured friend. You want a relationship with me ? Fine, we are fighting like any other couple, now leave." She said as she flung a pillow at his head.

" Fine, you want to act like an ungrateful bitch, go ahead. Have fun visiting your friend." He added with a sneer before apperating out for her room with a loud crack.

Ginny stayed on the bed for a minute, shocked that he actually left. She went and straightened herself up before going to leave the room only to find that he never unsealed the door.

" Tom ! you arrogant prick unseal this door" She yelled. She turned back to her room in time to see a piece of paper floating down on her bed. Catching it she saw only one word.

NO


	7. Your True Self

Chapter6

Ginny sulked for a few days, until she heard news that Dean was fine and suffered no lasting damage. Madam Pompfry remained perplexed about the circumstances surrounding the incident and after a few days talk had died off.

She couldn't stop thinking about what Tom had done, it shook her confidence. She thought she knew what she wanted, thought she knew what she was getting into but couldn't help but worry about Tom's jealousy and temper.

" Hello ! Earth to Ginny" Pansy said shaking Ginny's shoulders.

They were sitting in the great hall eating dinner, Only Ginny wasn't eating she was picking at her food and day dreaming.

" What ?" She responded still not looking at Pansy.

" Ginny what is with you ? I was asking if you finished the potions essay."

" Oh um not entirely I need a couple more inches."

" I haven't started, will you help me tonight ?"

" Huh ? Oh yea sure come to my room after dinner."

" Does that mean your actually gonna bother to eat ? because you didn't eat lunch either."

" No, Yea I'm...I'm eating. I was just thinking about stuff." She forced herself to stop thinking about Tom and focused on the gossip pansy was dishing out while they finished dinner.

" Now, you do know that we actually have to get this essay done. We need to focus pansy, I've seen the way you do homework, its no wonder its not done." Ginny said as they walked back to her room.

" Whats that supposed to mean ?"

"It means no listening to music really loud and no gossip magazines. I'm tried, I don't want to be doing this all night."

" Fine, Fine I promise."

They entered Ginny's room, flinging there bags on the bed, Ginny went to turn on the light but when she saw someone sitting in her desk chair she let out a small scream. The light came on and they both froze in place.

" Tom what are you doing here ?" Ginny asked in shock. Pansy looked at Ginny in horror before grabbing Ginny's arm and pulling her down into a bow.

" My lord, please forgive my friends irreverence, she's obviously lost her mind."

Tom stood up from the chair and walked over to them.

" tut, tut,tut. Really ms. Weasley why can't you be more like ms. Parkinson here." He said with a smirk.

Ginny's ears turned red with anger as she opened her mouth to protest. Tom just raised his eyebrow as if to dare her to challenge him. She promptly mumbled an apology.

"Ms. Parkinson, Would mind excusing us ?" Pansy knew it was really a question.

" We were gonna work on our potions essay" Ginny chimed in defiantly.

" Ginny who do you think your talking to" Pansy hissed in ginny's ear as she eyed Tom cautiously waiting to see if he would explode.

" Miss Parkinson, I think you can do your potions essay on your own tonight. If not get Mr. Malfoy to help you, Ms. Weasley will be otherwise engaged this evening." Tom said without taking his eyes off Ginny.

Pansy reluctantly grabbed her bag and looked at Ginny.

" Its ok Pansy, Draco will help you. I'll see you tomorrow at breakfast."

" Ugh I thought she would never leave." Tom said flinging his cloak over a chair and settling on the bed.

" What are you doing here Tom ?"

" Oh please don't tell me you are still mad."

" I don't know, I guess I don't know what I want anymore." She said stiffly, crossing her arms over her chest.

" Oh really ?" Tom got up from the bed and took a step closer to her. Ginny instinctively backed up to the door.

" What's happened to you Ginevra ?"

" I don't know what you mean ?"

" Yes you do. Over break you were not afraid of me, you knew what you wanted. Who got to you ? Who did you let scare you ?" He said taking a step closer.

" You, ok You scared me Tom, when you hurt Dean."

" You don't care about him."

" Yes I .."

" NO ! you don't" Tom cut in loosing his patience a bit. He was now flush against her body. She was breathing heavily from nerves and desire.

" You do not care anymore Ginevra. But you are to afraid to let go. To finally admit to yourself you don't care. Be yourself for once in your life. You don't care, there is no shame in that." Without another word his lips came crashing down on hers. She melted into his body, and was finally giving in when he pulled away and turned from her wandering around her room as he talked.

" You are very much like myself, if you would only just let yourself be. I have seen your thoughts, memories and feeling. You want power, you want to matter and you find yourself. I can give you all of that, you know it and that scares you. Tell me I'm wrong." He finally turned to face her.

" I... I want to. But its...hard."

" I know its hard for you princess" He ran the back of his fingers over her cheek.

" But I can give you everything and anything you desire. You would be worshiped, feared, respected. You will be my queen if only you would give in to me."

" I want you Tom." Was all she managed to get out before he kissed her again with such passion she thought she would go weak at the knees before he scoped her up and laid her on the bed.

" I've waited a very long time for this." Tom said as he kissed his way across her neck and chest as he unbuttoned her shirt.

" Tom, shut up and take off your pants."

The next morning Ginny woke up tangled up in her sheet and Tom's limbs.

" Holy shit " She whispered to her self as she tried to get out of bed without waking him.

" Is that a good holy shit or a bad one ?" Tom asked in s sleepy voice.

" A good one, most definitely a good one." She said as she started brushing out her hair.

" Come back."

" Give me a minute" She went into her bathroom, fixed her hair and brushed her teeth. When she came back into her room she started rummaging through her nightstand drawer.

" What are you looking for ?"

" Its a plastic circle case, its pink." She said starting in another drawer.

" Oh this ?" He said reaching for the packet on the window sill .

" Yes thank you" She grabbed it from him and went back into the bathroom.

" What is it ?"

" Nothing you need to worry about."

" I'm not worried but I'm curious." He said sitting up in bed and stretching.

" Do you want food ? I can sneak into the kitchens and get us something."

" I want you to tell me what that packet is."

She came out of the bathroom and leaned against her desk with her arms crossed eyeing him suspiciously.

"Why do you care so much ?"

" Uh because I care about you. And you shouldn't keep any secrets from me."

" It's not a secret, if you want to see it be my guest." She tossed the packet to him, knowing that there was no way he would ever figure out what it was. She wasn't entirely sure why she was baiting him like this but it sure was gonna be fun. Ginny knew if she were anyone else he would harm them but he has a sweet spot for her and she truly believed he would not hurt her...physically.

" Candy ?" Tom said said, before Ginny could stop one he ate one.

" Why are there days marked on it ?"

" Tom ! It's not candy. Its muggle medicine." She said laughing.

" Oh merlin, what the fuck are you doing with filthy muggle medicine. What's it going to do to me ?" He said freaking out and tossing the packet like it was diseased while Ginny stood laughing.

" Well" She said in mock seriousness " You won't get pregnant, so don't worry."

" What the fuck are you talking about Ginevra ? This isn't funny."

" Oh yes it is. Calm down." She said picking up the packet.

" Nothing is going to happen to you except I'll miss a day."

" Stop being evasive and tell me what it is."

" Its muggle birth control Tom, It's no big deal."

" Why are you on muggle medicine ? It's barbaric."

" Barbaric ? how is taking a pill any different from taking potions ?"

" You don't know what is in that or what it could do to you."

" Oh don't be ridiculous, I don't know any girl who doesn't take it."

" Why don't you just take the potion or use a spell ?"

" Ugh I'll tell you the same thing I told Draco, I didn't want my parents to find the potion and the spell can easily be forgotten. I take one of these every day, it's easier to remember."

" Well there you go, the potion is way better you only have to take after you have sex, your parents are not here. I think you should switch."

" No I'm not switching. This works fine. Quite trying to be controlling." She said starting to get annoyed. She looked at the clock and decided to start getting dressed.

" Ginevra you don't know what this could do to you. Muggles have morbid ways of doing things."

" Tom, darling" she said walking over to him and taking hold of his shoulders.

" I've been taking it for a year. I know the side effects, I know how it works. Nothing morbid about it. I take one pill a day and I'm protected. I can stop taking it any time if I chose to have kids. Its really no big deal. Now we had an amazing time last night so can we please not end it in an argument."

" Fine, but I don't like the idea"

" It's not your choice." she said with a shrug. Ginny could see his jaw twitch. Ginny knew he did not like things being out of control.

" Don't you think for one moment that I don't know what you are doing."

" What am I doing Tom ?"

" Your baiting me, Muggle birth control ? You are just trying to get back at me because your still mad over the moron who tried to date you."

" Oh please don't flatter yourself, I told you I've been on it for a year."

" Well, I can get you access to a healer and you can have the potion."

" I have a healer" Ginny responded gathering her books up for her morning classes.

" Tom, I have to get to breakfast, Are ... Am I... I mean when will I see you again ?"

" I'm not sure when I'll be able to come back." Tom said as he put on his clothes.

" Oh ok, well bye then." She turned to leave.

" Bye then ? Really Ginevra is that anyway to say goodbye after last night."

Ginny didn't even get to respond before he turned her around and drew her into a passionate kiss before apperating away, leaving her struggling to gain her composure before she left for the great hall.


	8. Higher Standards

Chapter 7

Ginny didn't have much time to wonder what her relationship with Tom was turning into. The teachers of Hogwarts seemed to make a pact with each other to make the 6th years lives hell. With the end of the school year rapidly approaching they were pilling on the homework worse then ever.

It did not feel like spring to her. Everyone was talking about going home for the summer. What they would do, or where they would go. Ginny was not looking forward to a summer of seclusion. Trapped a Shell cottage or some other secret location, listening to her mother fret about Harry, Ron and Hermione. She didn't care where they were, or what they were doing. She knew her mother would never let her go to Pansy's, or return to her summer job at the little bookstore in London.

"Ginny, this letter came for you today" Luna handed her a thin envelope. " The mail came before you arrived."

"oh thanks." Ginny looked at the letter, She recognized the handwriting. It was from her mother. She didn't want to her what she had to say. She was tired of all the lying but still didn't know what the hell she would tell her mother. She could just picture how that letter would go.

" Dear mom,

can't wait for this year to be over. This summer is going to be so much fun. I started a relationship with Tom Riddle and Pansy Parkinson is now my best friend. I will be staying with her over the summer so I don't have to hear about heroic harry all summer. Will write later

love always,

Ginny."

Ginny let out a sarcastic snort, shaking the ridiculous thought from her mind.

" What did your mum say ?" Luna asked.

"Oh Um I haven't opened it yet." Ginny turned her attention back to the letter.

_Dearest__Ginny,_

_ We haven't heard from you in a long time. I understand you are busy with the end of term so close but we want to hear from you. We are so looking forward to having you here this summer. For security purposes I can't tell you what the plans are for your safety. Someone will be a the train station to meet you and we will all be together again. Please write to us and keep yourself out of harms way. _

_ Love,_

_ mum_

Ginny groaned, How am I gonna get out of this ? she thought.

" She is just telling me about the summer. Its gonna be awful, I'm hiding for 3 months, and what if they won't let me come back ?"

" Oh I hope it doesn't get that bad. My dad mention leaving the country for the summer. I have a cousin in california, They own a grape vineyard. We have always wanted to go and see the Pixie colony that lives among grape vines. The fragrance attracts them from all corners of the world ! Sometimes they will grant you wishes if you know the right things to say."

" Cool, Luna that sounds... interesting for you." Ginny replied holding back a laugh. Sure, pixies from all over the world come to smell grapes.

That could work, Ginny thought to herself. I tell mom I'm going with Luna and then don't. Although technically she had not been invited to Pansy's for the summer but she was pretty sure that she could finagle an invitation out of her. Then she would be able to see Tom and all her real friends. She didn't know anything about the order so there was no security risk.

Ginny had come to the conclusion that she was completely ambivalent to the situation. Tom had suggested that she did not care about her family and that was just not true. She would never want anything to happen to them. She didn't want to fight her family but she didn't want to fight Tom either, She was switzerland.

She decided to wait to tell her mom about the "trip" She didn't want to take the chance that they would find out her lie.

The weather was beginning to warm up, Many students took to doing homework outside on the grounds. Ginny was leaning up against a tree making corrections to her potions essay. Pansy was pretending to work while Draco and Blaise practiced wand work and Astoria read.

"Thats it, I need a break." Ginny declared throwing he quill and paper down.

"Thank merlin" Pansy said.

" Pansy, you haven't done a damn thing in the last hour." Draco scolded taking a seat beside Ginny under the tree.

" Yea but I was getting tired of watching you all concentrate so hard."

Astoria finished the page she was reading an closed her book with a sigh.

" Oh man I can't wait for summer. Sun, sand and swimming for three months."

Ginny groaned.

" Whats wrong Ginny ?" Pansy asked

" I'm going to be spending my summer in some undisclosed location probably never aloud to leave or do anything fun."

" do anything fun meaning ..." Pansy smirked at her and raised her eyebrows.

" Yes Pansy, anything fun like swimming or shopping." Ginny said through gritted teeth. Ginny knew she wasn't fooling anyone but the fewer people who knew about her whatever it was she had going on with Tom the better.

" Well why don't you come to my house for the summer, Can't you make up some sort of lie ? You can go home the week before school starts again for you to get yourself ready to come back.

This was the first time Ginny gave any thought to the fact that she will be at Hogwarts alone next year. All her friends were already 7th years. She shook the thought from her head because it was already starting to depress her.

" Are you sure ? I don't want to be an imposition."

" You won't be, I promise. WE have plenty of guest rooms. My parents let me do pretty much whatever I want, We will have a blast."

" Ok thats very nice of you thanks Pansy. Won't you have to ask your parents first ?"

"No, but I will if it will make you feel better about it. What will you tell your parents ?"

Ginny didn't want to let on that she had already formed this plan before the invitation was extended.

"I'll have to think on it and let you know, thank you so much Pansy, now I'm excited. I've never really had much freedom over the summer before."

A few days later Pansy's parents told her yes and she told Pansy her plan to pretend to be on a trip with Luna. Ginny was looking forward to the weekend, there was a hogsmeade trip planned so she was determined to get all her homework done on friday night.

" I'm pulling a full on hermit thing tonight, I wanna be able to enjoy the weekend and I have qudditch practice sunday."

" Oh come on Ginny, Astoria snuck some liquor in, this party is gonna be fun."

" I have to much homework, besides I don't really drink."

" Thats because you haven't tried many drinks, I drink malibu in soda. It's so good. Coconut rum."

" Well, maybe If I get enough homework done I'll come later. Where is it ?"

"The room of requirement."

" Alright we'll I'm done eating so I better go start on this. I'll try to be there by 9:30."

Ginny Weasly way tipsy and well on her way to hammered by 11. She decided to reward herself for doing her homework. She had discovered the wonder that was malibu rum, everything Pansy said was true.

She was shamelessly flirting with Draco, or at least she thought she was, in truth she was being a little less Ginny and a little more Pansy. Most of the party had broken up by now except for Draco and his little group.

Ginny was demonstrating how well she thought she could sing when a swirl of black smoke came swooping in through a window.

Ginny and Pansy let out a little squeal, Ginny lost her balance, fell on her ass and started laughing hysterically. She didn't notice that everyone else where frozen silent and what had just happened.

" This is not the behavior I expect from my next generation of followers." Everyone quickly dipped into a bow.

" We are sorry my lord we were just indulging in a little fun." Draco spoke up.

" A little fun, of course we all deserve a little fun every now and then. But whose decided it was wise to give the girls alcohol" His eyes were fixed on Ginny who had her hand over her mouth to stifle her giggles.

" You will NOT do this again" He bellowed

" Draco, escort Ms. Parkinson to her room. Ginevra, get over hear." Ginny stumbled over to him, still not realizing his displeasure.

" You are all lucky I'm in a good mood, So leave now before I get really mad." Everyone filed out of the room, But Tom caught Ginny by that arm when she tried to leave.

" Not you. I'll make sure she gets to her room" He said. They all quickly left leaving the two alone in the room.

" What's up buttercup ?" She giggled while tussling a hand through his hair. He took ahold of her wrists and gave her a shake.

" What do you think your doing ? Huh. You can't act like this."

" Act like what dad ?" Tom's eyes flashed with anger and even in her drunken state she immediately regretted saying it.

" Act like a drunken slut."

"Excuse me ? I was having fun with my friends. I am not a slut."

" You were all over the boys in this room. What did I tell you about embarrassing me ?"

" Tom I was having fun with my friends, why are you acting this way ?"

" Because I can't trust you. I told you I will not share. I can not have you hanging on every guy in hogwarts."

" I am not even going to respond to that, If you are done lecturing me, I'm getting a headache and would like to go to bed." She quickly side stepped him and made for the door. Before she reached it however he grabbed her arm again and apperated them into her room.

" Hey, how did you do that ? you can't apperate inside of school."

" I am exceptional in many ways. Now get ready for bed, We will discuss this in the morning." Before she could respond she vomited on his shoes. Ginny slumped down on the bed with her hand over her mouth.

Tom didn't say a word as he took out his wand cleaned himself off.

"Where are you night things Ginevra ?" She didn't speak, she just pointed to that bathroom. By the time he came back she had fallen asleep in her clothes.

Ginny groaned and rolled over in her bed.

" Ouch, Ginevra you slapped me in the face." Ginny opened on eye slightly. The sun was streaming in her window, not good for the pounding headache she was experiencing.

" What are you doing here ?"

" Good morning to you too my dear."

" I feel like death." She groaned pulling a pillow over her face.

" I'm not surprised after the spectacle you made of yourself last night."

" What are you talking about ? We were having fun. Do you understand that I am 16, I'm trying to have fun. You had no right to break up that party."

" I had every right, If I hadn't done it you would have been caught and kicked out. I will not have a girlfriend who does not finish her education."

" You hold me to a higher standard Tom, Its not fair." She said solemnly before grabbing her clothes and went to take a shower, locking the door behind her.


	9. Foreign Affairs

Chapter 8

Foreign Affairs

There was never a dull moment for Ginny being friends with Pansy. On the trip to Hogsmeade they visited all the stores Ginny never even thought of entering. Pansy and Astoria were starting to build up a summer wardrobe. Something Ginny didn't know much about. She was lucky if she got a new bathing suit each year let alone a closet full of new clothes.

Ginny was convincing when she told them that she didn't need anything new. She hated feeling like a charity case. She still had fun however, trying on clothes.

Finally after 3 hours of non stop shopping they made their way to the pub to meet Draco, Blaise and a few other Slytherins.

" Merlin Pansy what could you have possibly needed to buy now?" Blaise asked as she stuffed all the bags under the table.

" They aren't all mine, besides a whole new season is approaching, I needed to update my wardrobe."

"Oh please, What did you get Ginny?"

" Just a pair of earrings."

" So... red, The dark lord seemed pretty pissed at you the other night. I'm surprised your able to function after being on the business end of his displeasure" Blaise said with a sneer. Draco kicked him hard under the table and shot him a stern look.

" Oh come on I was joking, but he was very mad."

Ginny shrugged and took a sip of her butter beer.

" He will get over it. He yelled, I threw up and then fell asleep."

" You threw up on him?"

" Maybe, I was drunk OK I don't really remember. He's probably still mad, pouting like a child. I doubt he will come back. I won't let him scare me or control me, I take it that is not something he is used to."

The rest of the table just looked at her puzzled. They knew the dark lord had a bit of a soft spot for her, but they didn't think he would take this kind of behavior from her.

" Just watch yourself Ginny, You never know when you may go to far." Draco warned,

" Thanks for the warning, but I can handle it. Can we talk about something else please?" Ginny began to regret her plea to change the subject when Pansy started to pull her new stuff out one by one to show everyone.

When Ginny returned to her room it was filled with boxes. Everything she picked up, looked at, tried on during the Hogsmeade trip had made its way to her room with no explanation. Ginny was pretty sure it had something to do with Tom, Had she known how to get a hold of him, she would have yelled about not needing this stuff, how he can't buy her and that she can provide for herself if she really needed something. However she didn't so she allowed herself to enjoy her new clothes.

After about an hour of trying stuff on and reorganizing her closet she made it to that last set of boxes embossed with the name of a store that she was not familiar with. She opened the box to find the most gorgeous lingerie she had ever seen. It was, of course in emerald green but she had to admit the color looked amazing with her hair. It was a satin halter baby doll with black lace accents. Ginny had never owned anything so rich looking. The second piece however looked like it came from a trashy adult boutique. Ginny knew of course that it didn't but the material or lack there off created one of the trashiest garments she had ever seen. Ginny never really considered herself conceded, but she knew the black and purple lace up corset would make her breasts look amazing. She only wished she knew when she would see Tom next so she could be prepared.

Weeks went by with no word from Tom, Ginny found her thoughts absolutely consumed by him. She could hardly concentrate on her exams. Although she missed Tom she was becoming so excited for her summer at Pansy's. Ginny had spun such a convincing lie for her parents that it almost scared her how naturally it came.

Ginny spent her time studying and packing up her room, it amazed her how quickly she accumulated so much stuff. Before she knew it, Hagrid was loading her stuff onto the train. Ginny felt bad that she had to fight off his warnings.

" I don't know what yer think yer doin Gin but harry, ron and hermione would not approve of the new company yer keepin."

" Thats half the appeal Hagrid. They left me"

" But yer shouldn't put yourself in danger just ter get back at 'em. Jus promise me yer be careful huh ?"

" Thank you for your concern Hagrid, You know I can look after myself. Take care of yourself will ya." The importance of this moment was not lost on Ginny. She knew this could be the last time she was seeing Hagrid for awhile. While she really was not sure where her heart was, she knew she did not want any harm to come to him.

"I'll be seeing you Gin. Have fun and be careful, Up you go, its almost time" Ginny gave him a weak smile. It was times like these that really made her question the choices she had been making over the last couple of months. She did her best to squash them before finding Pansy and the others on the train.

Ginny was having the best summer of her life at Pansy's. She couldn't imagine living a life of pure luxury, but she was now. Pansy's parents gave her no limits, they came and went as they pleased. The girls spent the first week of summer sitting by the pool every day, being served drinks and anything they wanted to eat.

Tom stayed away. Ginny wasn't really sure how she felt about that. On one hand she loved just having girl time with Pansy. Ginny was never one to let her world revolve around a man anyway, although she knew thats what Tom wanted. But she missed him, Ginny liked a challenge and Tom was definitely that. Mysterious, Dangerous but surprisingly gentle when he wanted to be.

"Ginny ! Ginny wake up !" Pansy was pounding on her bedroom door before she just barged in.

" What ? Pansy I'm sleeping." She said, her hair in a massive tangle of red messy curls, her eyes barely opened.

" I'm sorry but I have like, the best news !"

" What ?"

" I finally did it !"

" Did what ? Pansy its to early for mind games."

" Convinced my parents to let me, us spend the rest of the summer in Paris !"

" What ? Are you serious ? I have always wanted to go to Paris."

" I'm serious, We have an apartment there. I've been begging, they never let me go alone, I think because you are here they think we will be OK. Of course we have a full staff so its not like we will be totally alone. Besides Draco stays at his parents of a few weeks every summer, his parents trust him and we both know they shouldn't" Pansy explained.

" Oh that sounds so amazing." Ginny said longingly

" Whats wrong ?" Pansy asked. Ginny bit her lip.

" Well I ... just feel weird living off your parents. I was actually thinking it may be a good idea for me to get a part time job."

" What ? Ginny no ! I've told you over and over. Please say you will come, Please. You don't need a job. But if you insist, get one in Paris, You can't work in London anyway, Your parents think you are traveling."

" Pansy, I don't speak French well enough."

" Practically everyone speaks a little English there, with your little bit of french and their little bit of english you'll be fine. Besides I'm gonna show you so much fun you won't give this job nonsense a second thought." Ginny sat contemplating, of course she was going to go, but she still didn't feel right about it.

" When do we leave ?" Ginny finally asked with a smile. Pansy squealed and pulled her into a tight hug.

" As soon as we can get ready. My dad can get a portkey whenever he wants. Pack ! We can be there by lunch, oh merlin Ginny you are gonna love it. Good food, Awesome parties, amazing shopping, amazing guys !" Ginny snorted, leave it to Pansy.

" You will still take me to all the tourist attractions right ?"

" Deal, as long as you promise to let me drag you out of your shell."

" Deal."

" Good, Draco will be there in July, Astoria said she will come stay with us a bit when her family gets back from the states. Pack !" With that Pansy swept from the room leaving Ginny dumbfounded.

" Oh how the other half lives" Ginny said to herself before dragging herself out of bed and into the shower.

Pansy was not lying when she said Paris was amazing. They had been there 3 weeks already and Ginny was having the time of her life. They went shopping, they ate and drank. Pansy knew all the best clubs to go to. Ginny loved every minute. In Paris she could let loose and be totally herself. There were no prying eyes here. She knew her family was in hiding.

Ginny had decided to get a job though, much to Pansy's disapproval. Ginny was not used to sitting idle. Shopping everyday was nice for awhile but it became tiresome for her considering she didn't love fashion the way pansy did. Tonight was Ginny's first night at the cafe. She and pansy went there often, they befriended one of the baristas, Blair, and when she heard ginny wanted a job she set it up.

" Ginny, this job is pretty simple but it does get very busy around 5. Stick close by. You will follow me for a couple of days and then we will set you on your own." Blair explained.

" ok sounds good. Will we be waiting tables too ?"

" not for awhile, we really need the help just at the pastry counter but you can work towards waitressing if that's what you want."

For the next three hours Ginny, heated up scones, buttered muffins and boxed up donuts. This cafe was exactly what Ginny had always pictured a French cafe to be. It was a small place in the heart of the tourist section. It had about 10 mismatched little tables, a couch along one wall and a bookshelf along the other, opposite the pastry counter and drink bar. Three tables sat outside the big picture window that looked out onto the street. People came in with laptops to use the Internet. Ginny had learned all about computers from her father, who is obsessed with all things muggle.

Blair introduced her to the some of the other staff. It was a small place, only about four people needed to be on staff during non peak hours. One boy, Andre, who was the head barista took great interest in Ginny. He was tall with sandy blond hair that fell in curls about shoulder length. Ginny loved the way he tried to use English slang. More often the not he had it wrong.

" You know Ginny," he said in his thick accent " I wanted to lift you up the first time I saw you in here. But your friend, she is scary."

" Lift me up ? What are you talking about ?" she asked leaning against the counter, they were currently experiencing a nice lull in the the flow of customers.

" You know, flirt you."

" Oh ! You mean pick me up and flirt WITH me." She said laughing.

" Stop laughing, my English isn't perfect, like your French, miss do you want mustard for your muffin" Ginny threw him a playful punch in the arm.

" Are you seeing anyone?" Andre asked. Ginny bit her lip and thought for a moment. This was a complicated question. Was she with Tom? It's not like they see each other regularly. They never really defined their situation.

" It's complicated" Ginny mumbled. Then to Ginny's relief, as if on cue two women walked in, interrupting their conversation.

That night after her shift Ginny sat on her bed in her bedroom counting her tips. The staff split all tips at the end of the night. She was pretty pleased with herself, this was her first job and while she knew she wouldn't get rich from the salary she was happy to be earning her money. She had opened an account at the beginning of the summer, or rather the Parkinson's did for her. They insisted on giving her the same exuberant allowance they gave pansy. Ginny protested of course but it fell on deaf ears. Never in a million years would she be able to spend all that money but she didn't mind saving it if they wouldn't take it back. A loud crack made her head snap up in surprise.

" Don't do that Tom ! " she snapped. She should be used to it by now, But she jumped even when she was expecting someone to paper apparate in.

" I can do anything I want Ginevra" he snapped back.

" Someone woke up on the wrong side of the bed today" she said in a sing songy voice and rolling her eyes.

" Don't get smart with me I am not in the mood for your cheek." He scolded walking around the room, taking in his surroundings. This room was simply decorated compared to the rest of the Parkinson's Estate. Pale purple walls, light brown wood furniture. Sliding doors led out onto a small patio. The room had a beautiful vanity. Ginny loved doing her hair and makeup at it. She had a full sized closet to accommodate all her new clothes and her own bathroom no less.

Tom ran his finger over to the tall dresser as if checking for dust.

" Then why did you come if you are not going to be pleasant, I haven't seen you in months." She pouted.

" I've been busy, don't you think I wish I could just laze around Paris with you all day. I have more important things to do". More important then me, Ginny thought to herself, she decided to let that slide for now as he continued to talk.

" However I took time to come here and scold you my little paramore."

" What ? I didn't do anything!" she said crossing arms.

" You think moving to Paris without letting me know, getting a job at a muggle establishment, flirting with some coffee brewer and walking through the streets of Paris at night alone is nothing! " he seethed.

" So your obviously having me followed." she said calmly.

" Of course."

" Well then I was walking home alone was I ?" she said shooting him a cheeky smile.

" This not a game " he yelled over her giggling. " I care about you, I'm possessive, you know this so why can't you just listen to me. You will not go back to that job, you will not flirt with others and you will not walk around at night alone. Do you understand ?" Tom fixed her with a glare that momentarily made Ginny want to agree.

" I know your possessive and you know I don't let people dictate my life so if you think I'm going to bow down and comply you've got another thing coming." She stood up from the bed, her hands on her hips and fixed him with an equally withering glare.

Tom was about to open his mouth to argue when Pansy knocked on the door.

Ginny looked at Tom who gave her a don't even think about it look.

" shes waiting for me, we are going out."

" Oh I don't think so darling it's well after midnight." he said through gritted teeth. Pansy knocked again. " Ginny, we're going to be late."

" Come in Ms Parkinson" Tom said only slightly raising his voice but not taking his eyes off Ginny. Pansy must have recognized his voice because she hesitated.

" Now Ms. Parkinson " Tom added, Ginny could tell his temper was rising and his patience was being tested. Pansy came bursting in the door with a very nervous expression on her face.

Pansy was all dressed up. She and Ginny were heading to a club to meet some of Pansy's friends.

" Ms. Weasley isn't feeling well tonight."

" I'm not ?" Ginny asked.

" No, your not. Leave Ms Parkinson, she will see you tomorrow." Pansy shot Ginny a bewildered glare,Ginny shrugged and tilted her head to the door, indicating that she should leave. She quickly obeyed.

" Tom I wanted to go !"

" I don't care."

" You don't care about my happiness ?."

" No." Tom answered Ginny raised her eyebrow and opened her month to respond but was cut off.

" I care about your safety Ginevra."

" I'm fine Tom, Pansy's parents wouldn't have let us come if it was unsafe here."

" Parents, please. Kind of playing it fast and loose with the word parents there. They do not care about being parents they pay that girl to leave them alone."

" That's a horrible thing to say you don't know them."

" Ginevra I couldn't care less about the Parkinson's parental abilities, I came here to see you." Tom walked over to her slowly. Picked up a strand of her red hair and twirled it around his finger.

" I love your hair, color matches your personality." he mumbled. Ginny loved these rare quiet moments when the dark lord in him melted away and she could see remnants of the sixteen your old Tom Ginny knew was still somewhere deep inside him.

" Admit it, you like that I fight you on your ridiculous demands."

" My demands...are not ridiculous. You know that you are they only one I tolerate a certain extent of disobedience from."

" A certain extent?" she raised her eyebrow at him.

" That's not a threat Ginevra, more of a warning. I ...I don't ." he stopped speaking, sighed and ran a hand through his hair.

" What ? What's wrong ?" Ginny asked as Tom started pacing the room.

" Everyone knows you test my limits. Not everyone is happy about ...this thing I have with you. I never let them see just how much power you hold over me. If they knew, they could hurt you. So this back and forth banter we have going on, can never leave this room. If you do this in front of my followers, I'm afraid of what I'll do. Anyone else would be dead in a minute. I guess I'm just afraid I'll lose it with you. And I don't want to."

" Tom, I trust you. I don't think you would ever hurt me" she said taking his hand so he would stop pacing.

" physically." she added.

" And otherwise ?"

" Well Tom you have the power to hurt me emotionally more then anyone. But that is a risk you take when you start...dating someone?" She said, more of a question then statement.

" I knew you would eventually want to define this. It's complicated Ginny, you know that."

" Uncomplicate it for me then. If I'm not allowed to flirt or date, wouldn't that suggest that we are exclusive ?"

Tom didn't say anything.

" Ugh fine, I guess I was the only one who wanted more. Whatever Tom I am so sick of this. You want me to give all of myself to you and I get nothing from you in return. That's not fair and I think you know I'm not made for the life of an obedient, submissive wife. Barefoot, pregnant and in the kitchen. To be seen and not heard." Ginny said, her temper and voice raising with every word that fell out of her mouth. This man was so infuriating yet she can't seem to walk away. As what she said said started to sink in she turned to look at Tom.

" Wife ? Pregnant ? What the hell are we doing talking about kids !"

" Its an expression Tom I didn't mean that I wanted..." Tom cut her off.

" Oh I think you did Ginevra. I think for once you are being honest. You want something I can't give you."

" Can't or won't ?" she replied quietly.

"I'm not a family man if you haven't noticed. I won't let you try to turn me into a Weasley." he said in disgust. Ginny was fighting back tears as the harshness of what he had said sunk in. When it became clear he wasn't going to take it back, she tried to compose herself to speak.

" I never said I wanted any of that. " She said choking back tears.

" Then what's the problem ? I came here to fuck you not have a heart to heart."

" Are you trying to make up for not physically hurting me by emotionally hurting me ?" She asked,tears falling in earnest now.

" oh I'm sorry, am I not catering to your emotional needs ? I don't need this crap Ginny. I'm not capable of a relationship, I thought you understood that."

" The demands you are putting on me sure seem like a relationship. I'm not allowed to seek a relationship elsewhere but you just think of me as a fuck buddy. I'm not interested."

Tom walked dangerously close to her. The look in his eyes scared Ginny. She regretted pushing him so far. Ginny raised her hand to push him away but he grabbed her wrist tightly.

" Let go Tom, your hurting me." She said quietly.

" Oh am I ? Am I hurting you Ginevra ?" He asked through gritted teeth. He threw her arm back at her causing her to lose her balance. He pushed her down onto the bed and crawled on top of her.

" Your a fucking tease Ginny Weasley." he said grinding his hips into hers. He had both her wrists in an iron grip above her head. His other hand was gripping her hip so hard she would surely have a bruise. His hand slowly moved up her shirt skimming the bottom of her bra.

" Please don't Tom. Please." his face twisted in a evil smirk.

" What happened to I trust you Tom, you would never hurt me physically" he said his voice dripping with disdain.

His grip on her wrist tightened, signaling to her that he expected an answer.

" Your scaring me. I was trying to give you the benefit of the doubt. I see I was wrong." Tom kissed her hard on the mouth. Ginny was pinned, she could hardly fight him off.

" You want it Ginny, admit it. Your always so responsive to my touch." He leaned down and bit her neck, sucking hard, marking her skin.

" Ouch Tom please, your hurting me." Tom grabbed a fist full of her hair brining it to his face, he inhaled her scent.

" You drive me crazy Ginny. Don't you see that. I can't do this. You jeopardize everything I've been working for." To Ginny's surprised he pulled himself off of her without warning. Ginny was to afraid to move. Tom ran had through his hair.

" This thing we have going on, is over. If you want to join our cause, fine but you will be nothing put another faceless death eater in my ranks. And you will obey me as such." Ginny didn't get to respond before he disapperated, leaving Ginny stunned on the bed. She got up, walked over to her vanity and stared at herself in the mirror. Her hair was disheveled, her shirt hiked up, red marks on her neck and her lips swollen from his savage kisses. She stood there, stunned by what had just happened before dissolving into tears.

A/N: Thank you all for being so patient. I worked really hard on this I hope you like it. Please read and review so i know that I'm heading in a good direction and can stay motivated to write more ! Also, i apologize for my lame description of Paris. I've never been there.


	10. Let me go

Author's note: I decided to start using first person POV hope you guys like it. i think it will help me with more descriptive detail. Something I know my stories tend to lack. Please Please read and review !

Chapter 9

Ginny's POV

I lay crumpled in a ball on my bed for what seemed like hours. I knew Pansy wouldn't be home until the early morning. Fine with me, I don't feel like talking. My heart feels like it was put in a blender. I Always hated that exaggeration in romance novels. I mean really, who knows what that feels like. Why can't you just say I feel like crap the guy I have feelings for is an ass and I just became aware of it.

However, you know what, My heart actually does feel like what I would believe my heart being in a blender would feel like. I can't believe he got so mad, I didn't mean anything by what I had said. Well, maybe I did, I don't know, I suppose I never really thought about it.

Tired of feeling like a victim I pulled myself off the bed and went to take a bath. Taking one final look in the mirror, I want to remember what this looks like, So I can remind myself that I ever want to be here again. Stripping off my clothes I ran steaming water and cherry blossom body wash into the oversized Jacuzzi tub and slipped into the foaming water.

The water stings at first but as my body acclimates to the temperature I relish in the relaxing aroma of the bubble bath. I close my eyes and lean my head back trying to clear my mind.

Did I see myself as Tom's wife? And eventually with a baby on the way? I never really thought myself the marrying type or the mother type. I loved my mother, wait love, I love my mother even though I am starting to pull away from my families wholesome beliefs, I love my mother but I never wanted to be her. I think I am more confused now then ever.

I remember back to a fight I overheard my parents having when I was younger. I was sitting on the staircase late at night having crept out of bed to get a snack, It was the night before my first year at Hogwarts and I was restless. I heard raised voices coming from the kitchen.

" Molly I didn't mean it that way. I love you, I love our life and our children are the world to me." I heard my father say in an urgent half whisper after my mother had scolded him for his volume.

" You said that you should have taken that job in America Arthur! Do you think I don't know that if you had we wouldn't be struggling. I know that but we decided that with a toddler and another on the way it wasn't the time to move away from our families to a strange country."

" I know Molly, I didn't mean it. It was said in anger." I could hear the pleading in his voice. I never knew that we could have lived in America, it must have caused allot of problems for them to never have mentioned it even once.

" True feelings come out in times of anger Arthur" My mom's voice was sad and final, I heard footsteps coming closer so I ran back to my room. The next morning was so hectic getting to King's Cross I never gave it a second thought. That wasn't the last time I heard mom say true feeling come out in times of anger.

Was she right? She must be, as much as I don't like to admit it, she usually was right.

"She is right" Ginny whispered to herself as tears formed in the corner of her eyes. I tried to tell myself that my needs and wants are important, that I shouldn't settle, I deserved to be happy. My eyes started drooping and I realized I was exhausted, crying always gave me a headache and made me tired. The pep talk I kept repeating to myself didn't keep me from missing Tom.

Slowly I pulled myself out of the now tepid bath water, wrapped myself in a large fluffy towel and got ready for bed. Sleep didn't come easy but after I took all of the clothes Tom had bought me and burned them I felt a little better and eventually fell into a fitful sleep. My dreams were filled with memories of Tom and I, What we were and what we could become. I didn't quite know where the relationship was going or even how far it could go considering who he was. All I knew was that the dreams were happy ones but as I lay in bed looking up at the ceiling as the sun started to creep through the break in the curtains they slipped away from me. I hate it when I wake up from a dream and for a few precious seconds it fills me with joy before being erased from my mind completely.

I had to be at work by 11 so I didn't get to see Pansy. She would have killed me if I had woke her up. She was probably hungover and will sleep most of the day. To my great relief, it was so busy at the cafe I didn't have much time to think about Tom or for anyone to ask why she wasn't her normally bubbly self or why her eyes were puffy from crying.

" Hey Ginny we are going out for a girls night after work, Do you want to come?" Janelle, one of the other Baristas asked. I really like Janelle but I'm not sure I'm up for it. Or maybe its just what I need to get over this.

" Oh thanks for the invite but I don't really"

"Ginny" Janelle interrupted. " I hope you don't mind me saying but you look like hell. I know we don't know each other that well but I know a breakup when I see one. Come, please it will be fun." I thought for a minute before answering. I knew tonight would be fun, Fun seems to follow Janelle, guys too. I looked a her in her tight jeans, long brown hair swept up in a messy pony tale that happens to look great on her.

" Ok. Umm where are you going?"

" The is this great club a few blocks from here that Andre is a bartender at a few nights a week. He can get us free drinks. We are gonna meet out front here at 9:30."

" Ok" I could get wasted tonight, plenty of people drown their sorrows in alcohol.

After work I came home to get ready to meet the girls. I was almost immediately ambushed by Pansy asking me questions about my hot night with Tom. I gave her the succinct version, not really feeling like getting into it.

" Is that why all your best clothes are gone and there is a pile of ashes on the floor."

" Oh yea" I said as I started gathering my things for a shower. "I burned all the clothes he gave me"

"Ginny ! they were gorgeous"

" Pansy please, I don't want to talk about this anymore. I'm meeting the girls in an hour to go out. I need a shower." I picked up my towel and retreated to the bathroom.

" Ginny I'm going to get another drink, Do you need a refill ?" Janelle yelled over the blaring music on the dance floor. I held up my still full cosmo in response and kept dancing.

This place was awesome. I lost track of time as we danced to the music. I've really been having allot of fun. There was a restaurant hooked onto the club and several smaller bars. It was nice to be able to step away from the blaring music and flashing lights every once in a while.

I'm dressed in my favorite jeans mini skirt with a pale pink layered cami with a beaded round neckline. My 3 inch white wedge heels and glitter wristlet complimented the outfit well.

Swaying to the music and sipping my drink I let the loud foreign music wash over me. I can feel myself letting loose. It feels great. Suddenly I feel a hand on my ass and my head snaps to its owner.

" Can I help you ?" I shout at the big oaf who seemed to think it was ok to grope me. His hands slip to my waist as he holds me against him and starts moving to the music. I try to pry his hands off but they won't budge.

" Excuse me, Could you please let go"

" Your hot !" The tall blonde haired man shouts.

" Uh thanks do you think you could get your hand off my ass ?" I say getting a little nervous at the aggressive look in his eye.

" I want to dance with you."

" Thats nice but I don't want too, let go."

" Come on you can't expect to flaunt that ass and not expect attention."

" And you can't expect to get anywhere with a girl acting like a lush." Slipping out of his grasp I begin to walk away as he grabs my wrist, wishing I had my wand my instincts take over and I fling my drink in his face.

" You little bitch" I hear him growl, all of a sudden out of nowhere a fist goes flying at his face. I stare in shock as I look at him sprawled out on the floor. The crowd has parted but doesn't seem very concerned about what happened. I image it happens allot considering the amount of alcohol that is consumed here. I look up and see two big bouncers coming our way. I frantically look around for Janelle I see her at the bar talking to Andre, I can't get to her because of the crowd. I wave and gesture to the door, trying to tell her to meet me outside. The crowd seems to be crushing together as I try to squeeze by. Its going to take forever to get out. Suddenly a hand slips into mine and I feel the familiar pull of apparition.

At first I'm relieved but start to panic when I realize I was in a muggle club with muggle friends. As my feet slam into the ground I feel someones arm slip around my waist to steady me. I look up into the mesmerizing green eyes of Tom Riddle. For a moment we just stare at each other, our eyes locked as the sound of the music and random people outside the club smoking and talking melt away.

As reality slowly starts to seep into my brain the fog lifts and I pull away remembering our fight. Tom didn't say anything to he just turned and walked away turning down an ally, after a moments hesitation I decided to go after him. I turned the corner just in time to see him apperate away.

" Ginny, Ginny" I shake my head and look up the street towards Janelle. She looks frantic, carrying her shoes she is running towards me.

" What the hell happened ?"

" That guy wouldn't take his hands off me, I threw my drink in his face and somebody punched him."

" Who ?"

" I ... I don't know I didn't see him. Can we please go home, Its been a rough day." Janelle flung an arm around my shoulders as we started walking towards the main street to catch a cab.

" How bout I buy you a cup of coffee and you tell me about this ass hole who broke your heart ?" I sighed heavily before answering. I was torn, I didn't want to talk about it but I knew it could help, although I knew I couldn't disclose everything about the relationship.

" Sounds good, Someplace quite." She chuckled as she steered me down the street.

Ten minutes later we are sitting in a coffee shop a short ways from the club. Its kind of a dump but the coffee is decent. Its 2 am so we didn't have much choice. As I look around I can see that its a popular place for the many club hoppers to sit, talk and try to ward off a wicked hangover.

I told Janelle my story as best I could. Revealing that It was a long distance, complicated relationship.

" Sounds like a jerk, you can do better. You don't want someone who is that afraid of commitment."

" I know your right, It will just take some time." I gave her a weak smile. We finished our coffee and half an hour later I was laying in bed wondering how and why Tom showed up tonight.

Was he having me followed? Probably, However it happened it was clear he still had feelings for me, if he cared enough to help me. He better not show up again, I don't need him playing with my emotions. I can't turn them on and off the way he can.

The rest of the week was pretty boring. Pansy and I took a train to the beach a couple of days. Business at the cafe started to slow down, I guess people don't drink as much coffee in the heat.

Last night as we were closing up Andre asked me out for dinner tonight. I accepted, I guess now is as good a time as any to start dating.

" What do you think of this one?" I asked Pansy for the tenth time. I could decide what to where. Pansy was laying on her back on my bed tossing a pillow in the air out of boredom.

" Pansy look please" I begged.

" Ginny it looks great, truly. Just like the last dozen."

" I'm sorry, I'm just nervous. I'm not sure I should be doing this."

" Why?"

" Well because we work together. And Tom..."

"Ginny Tom made his feelings clear. He was toying with you showing up the other night. Thats what he does. You should make him jealous."

" Let me just try to get through this night first before you start scheming." Pansy just laughed.

The date was nothing special, Dinner and a movie, very muggle. We didn't have the chemistry Tom and I shared.

" I uh had a nice time Andre thank you." I said as we reached the lobby of my building.

" Its ok Ginny, I know we don't have it. Still friends?" I was so relieved he felt the same way, I let out a breath I didn't know I was holding.

" Im so glad, yes. I would hate to lose you as a friend. I'm glad we are on the same page."

He shrugged. " I'm glad we tried. I'll see you at work tomorrow." As I turned to unlock the door he added " Ginny, whoever it is that you can't stop thinking about is a lucky guy, He's an idiot for hurting you."

I gave a weak smile, not really caring enough to ask how he knew.

"Thanks, I appreciate that"

" Ginny come on you have to come! Please"

"Pansy, I can't, I don't want to see him."

" Don't you want to make him jealous?" I bit my lip, I did kinda.

" I guess. But he said that if would just be another death eater in his ranks. Nothing more."

" Well first off, You are only 17 and still have another year at school. Nobody will admit it but he doesn't accept many women into the ranks. I think we get the best of both worlds, all the invites to parties and none of the death defying missions."

" Seen and not heard" I whispered to myself, remembering the words from out fight.

" What?"

" He likes his women seen and not heard, It was one of the reason's we fought."

" Oh Ginny, I'm sorry. Come on, Draco will be your escort. It will be fun"

I thought about it for a moment, weighing my options, baiting Tom was probably not the wisest move, But I do think he has the propriety not to go after a women in the middle of a party. I'll just make sure I'm not left alone with him.

" Promise you will help me find a killer dress?" I asked Pansy, a wicked smile spread across her face.

" Happens to be my specialty."

Apparently new death eater initiation night was a big deal. Draco, Blaise, Crabbe and Goyle were all among the honorees. We were all invited to a fancy ball after the ceremony which we were not allowed to attend. Each honoree is assigned an escort for the evening. I wasn't sure what all the entailed but Draco had chosen me and Blaise took Pansy.

We only had a few days to plan and I had no idea where it was being help, what we did know was that it was going to be very fancy. Had to process in and lead the first dance. Perfect for Draco and I to make Tom jealous, I just needed to make sure that if Tom got mad he wouldn't take it out on Draco.

Pansy took me to a dress shop in Paris, the fanciest I had ever seen. We had to be let it by ringing a doorbell on the fancy gold doors. It led into a lobby with beautiful marble floors. Suddenly I felt under dressed, I had not idea places like this existed.

The was a receptionist desk in front o.f a lovely glass wall that had lights rotating different colors over the sheet of water that was flowing from the top into bath that had lilies floating in it. To the left of the water fall was a corridor that rounded a corner what was back there I could only imagine.

Pansy told the perfectly groomed woman behind the desk her last name.

" Of course Ms. Parkinson, Lynette is expecting you. I'll let her know you are here and in the mean time please help yourself to some light refreshments." She gestured her hand off to the right and for the first time I noticed a waiting area with a coffee bar, and an assortment of pastries and several leather seats. In the middle was a large glass circular coffee table with copies of fashion books to look through.

" We have a personal shopper?" I asked as we made our way over.

" Of course, the everyone does here." Pansy said as she poured herself a glass of water with cucumbers floating in it. How odd I thought and crinkled my nose shaking my head when she offered it to me.

" Where are the racks of dresses?" I asked

" Ginny, Places like this bring them out one by one based on what we tell them. We get to sit back and relax. I told you this would be fun. Honestly for a girl as pretty as you, I don't get why you don't like shopping." Before we could take our seats the clicking sound of heels on the marble floor caught our attention. Looking over I saw a woman who I assumed was Lynette approaching us.

She had on a ver simple knee length black dress, She reminded me of Audrey Hepburn in my favorite muggle movie, Breakfast at Tiffany's.

"Ms. parkinson, How lovely to see you again." She said in her thick French accent. She extended her arms grasping Pansy's they kissed on each cheek.

" Lynette dear you look beautiful as always, This is my friend Ginevra Weasley"

" Call me Ginny please" I said extending my hand. She grasped it with both of hers and kissed the air next to my cheeks the way I have only seen in movies.

" Ladies pleas follow me" She turned and we followed her around the corner. There were several sleek black doors with numbers on them. As we disappeared into number two she asked how we were enjoying Paris and the particulars of the event we were shopping for. I let Pansy answer, I was too in awe of my surroundings.

The room was painted a soft blue, It had no windows but that didn't seem to matter. It was perfectly lit. Along the side wall was a cream colored couch, next to it off to the side was a small desk with a gold lamp and a day planner on it. On the ceiling behind the couch were several hanging lights, all directed toward what I can only describe as a small run way.

She gestured to us to take a seat, as we did she positioned herself at the small desk. She started asking questions about dress types, length, color, style, neckline. Pansy seemed to answer all the questions for me, I didn't mind because I wasn't sure what I needed for such a fancy event. I wanted to look perfect, not just for Tom but because I was going to be in the procession.

After we briefed Lynette on what they needed she disappeared for a while behind a door that was situated at the right behind the run way. Some time later 5 beautiful girls paraded in on the runway in the most beautiful dresses I had ever seen.

The girls each stepped forward and twirled for us to see. One dress immediately had my attention. It was the most beautiful, sexy dress I had ever seen.

" Do you see anything you like?" Lynette asked.

" That gold one is amazing" I answered. The girl in the dress stepped forward on the runway.

" Annie is wearing a gold sequin halter with deep V neck. The sequins fade into a sheer skirt that show just a hint of those sexy legs. The back is open with a hook and eye closure. This dress will hug your body in all the right places. And of course no dress would be complete without matching gold stilettos." Lynette finished as Annie twirled one more time and stepped back in line. I was in love.

" Ginny, you have to try that on." Pansy chimed in.

" What size ?" Lynette asked.

" 2 please." I replied

" And for the shoes?"

" Oh uh 7."

" Of course, I will be right back." Five minutes later she returned with a garment bag, she went and hung it in a small dressing room in the corner I had not noticed before.

Excitedly I undress and unzip the bag. I let my fingers gently run across the expensive dress. Its impeccable, I almost don't want to touch it. Very carefully I take it off the hook and step in. it fits like a glove. I turn to look at the full length mirror. I hardly recognize myself. It shows just a hint of cleavage and leg. I turn to see the open back. I sit on the small chair and fasten the heels, they to fit perfectly.

" Ginny, Get your butt out here" I hear Pansy call. I roll my eyes as I emerge from the dressing room. Lynette gestures for me to step up on the runway.

" Its perfect, I love it." I saw

" Me too, Gin its amazing on you."

" Are you ladies sure you don't want to see a few more ?" Lynette asked.

" I really don't think we need to, Unless Pansy are you getting something ?" I asked.

" Oh no, I have mine already." She answered, I raised my eyebrow at her. When did she go shopping without me?

" I had to do something while you were at work, I'll show you when we get home."

Tom's POV

She forgot about that bracelet. Truth be told I did too. I think she got so used to wearing it she never gave it a second thought. I felt her fear, I knew she was in danger so how could I have stayed away.

I had to break it off with her. I cant have any weaknesses. I repeat to myself as I pace my study. I can't let anyone, let alone a woman have that much power over me. She could bring me down.

What was she doing in that club, the thought of her with another man drives me crazy. I pick up the glass of fire whiskey I was drinking, down the rest and smash it against the wall.

There is a knock at the door and I'm reminded that its time for the initiation. I'll be adding 10 young soldiers to my ranks. I don't know why I told Ginny she could be a death eater. I don't induct women, they are too emotional. Even If I did I would never mark her gorgeous skin and I would never put her in such danger.

I gather myself. Take another shot of whiskey and put on my dress robes. The initiation is about to begin. I hate formalities, any other occasion I would so blow off. I'll leave the ball early. I pocket my wand, take one more look at my hair before straitening my robes and heading to the banquet hall.

Ginny's POV

I'm standing arm and arm with Draco in the hall outside of the banquet hall. Pansy and Blaise are somewhere else in the line. Draco and I are first. I don't like this because I won't have anyone to watch. It easy, I tell myself just let Draco lead me onto the dance floor, Dance, then sit and eat. Piece of cake. Except I'm in the tallest heels I've ever worn. Although I must say, I do look great in this dress. Wait until Tom sees me.

" I could ravage you right here and now. Your driving me crazy in that dress." Draco whispered in my ear. Before I could respond the doors in front of us opened and Draco started walking. I was concentrating so hard on not stumbling I didn't let myself look around the large room until after the dance was over. Draco took my hand, kissed it and led me towards the table where the new death eaters we all taking their seats with their partners. Finally allowing myself to relax a bit I take in the exquisite decor of the room. Circular tables with white linen and golden place settings from the modest sized dance floor. Beautiful floral center pieces and topiaries add color to the romantically light room. At the far end is a small platform with an orchestra playing the most beautiful music. The ceiling, much like the great hall, is reflecting a cloudless night sky with candles floating overhead. I look towards the front of the room and see a table with only one empty seat. Already seated at the table is Lucius, his wife, Mr & Mrs Goyle, The Lestranges and another couple I don't know.

" The inner cirlce's table" Draco whispers to me, he must have seen me looking at it.

" He will be hear soon and fill the last empty seat." I nodded. I felt like I had a few butterflies in my stomach. As far as I know, he doesn't know I am here. I doubt he was trouble himself with something as trivial as a guest list. Suddenly the doors opened again and all the death eaters stood. Tom entered without much ceremony. He took his seat and that was it. He never even looked my way.

" So can you tell us about the ceremony?" I asked.

" No, We aren't really allowed. It wasn't that great though. Pretty short." Blaise answered. Soon the food appeared on the table, which was delicious of course. Aware that I was under scrutiny, I ate as delicately as possible, determined not to soil my dress. I didn't know if they knew of my involvement with Tom, but a Weasley at a death eater party always draws attention.

Once the dancing started Draco and I hardly left the dance floor. I danced with Blaise and a few others as well. At one point as I was twirled around by Draco my eyes caught Tom's. It was unmistakable, His eyes burned with intensity, His jaw set tightly. If looks could kill I'm not sure if I'd be dead of if Draco was the target of his sinister glare.

I made sure to be extra flirty when I knew that he was looking. I leaned in close when Draco talked, making sure my dress dipped to show more cleavage. Pansy and Blaise had snuck off about an hour after dinner and we hadn't seen them since. I was getting a little bored so I wandered over to the chocolate fountain and dipped a few strawberries. It was delectable. The sweet warm chocolate mixed with the fresh strawberries in my mouth.

" Ginevra" I knew who it was before I turned. I felt his fingers gently graze down my exposed back. It sent a shiver down my spine. I missed his touch. I dipped one more strawberry before I turned around, knowing that taking a bite would draw attention to my mouth and drive him crazy.

"Tom" I said acknowledging his presents.

"I'm surprised to see you here"

" Are you? Draco invited me, I wasn't aware that I had to clear it with you."

" You don't, Anymore I suppose" He was trying to act cool but I could see it in his eyes he were burning with angry, jealousy and what she thought was desire.

" How did you know I needed help at the club?" He didn't answer, he just picked up my left wrist and pointed to the bracelet.

" I completely forgot. Can you please take it off?" I felt the burning in the back of my throat, I needed to get away from him so I don't cry.

" No"

" Tom, please" I whispered " I can't do this. I need you to take it off" My voice was barely a whisper, its all I could manage.

" I need to know you are safe." He still had my wrist in his hand, He was running his thumb up and down my skin.

" You don't have that right anymore. You ended this, not me. Take it off" My voice was getting stronger as the anger welled up inside me.

" Let talk outside." Tom said, I knew better, I knew I shouldn't go with him. But I really wanted to know what he had to say, I missed him.

He took my hand and led me out the banquet hall doors it was littered with death eaters with drinks in their hands smoking cigarettes. They all looked up as we entered, rather then ordering them to leave Tom pulled me into a small room off the hall way. Looking around I saw it was a coat room, Obviously hadn't been used to awhile. There were stacks of extra chairs and folded up tables. We had to squeeze into the available space between an old piano and a drink cart.

" What Tom, What can you possibly say you made your feelings perfectly clear already."

" Why can't I make you understand?"

" Because I won't settle. I do understand your position, you don't want a wife, kids, normal job. We can't have a happy home. I get that but you need to understand that I want that and I won't compromise, I shouldn't have too. My feelings matter too."

"I don't know how to give you what you want." He growled. I know I was making him mad, He is not used to people not giving in to his way.

" I know that, Which is why this is over. You need to let me get over you, you need to let me move on." I turned to leave but he grabbed my wrist and pulled me close to him in a passionate kiss. Giving in for a second too long, when I felt his had slide down my back I was brought back to reality and pushed at his chest.

"Tom stop."

" Ok, Ok I just...I just can't give you what you need. That kills me. I can't stand to see you with another man. Especially that filthy muggle coffee server." His hand was still holding onto my wrist so tight but I hardly noticed.

" Well get used to it, I'll see whomever I want to. Now let me go." He threw my arm back at me and I stumbled back. I can't say I was surprised, I know how moody he is.I turned and left, He didn't stop me.

Two days later I walked to work, Still trying to shake off what happened at the ball. As I turned the corner of the street the cafe was on I heard allot of commotion. The sidewalk was blocked off. As I pushed my way closer through the crowd I saw that the cafe was engulfed in flames. Off to the side talking to police was Janelle, tears were streaming down her face. I called out to her. She must of told the officer who I was because he gestured for me to come through the police tape.

"What happened?"

"We don't know." She sobbed pulling me into a hug.

"Did everyone get out ?" She pulled back from me so she could see my face.

" We can't find Andre." She whispered. " He was in the back office when the alarms went off we were just about to open for the day"

"They will find him, He will be fine. Do they know what happened?" I asked turning to the officer.

"They think it was arson."

"Why do they think that" I asked The officer pointed to the brick siding of the cafe that had not yet been completely burned.

" Somebody tagged it. We see this allot with gangs. Obviously we will launch a full investigation once the fire is put out." I turned to look at where the officer had pointed. The mark on the side of the building was clear to only me. It was the dark mark.


	11. Clarity

Chapter 10

I felt numb, how could he go this far? More importantly, why was I surprised. Of course he went that far. Look who I'm talking about. Tom didn't want me to have a job. Now I have no job. He didn't want me dating, now the boy who took me on one innocent date was in a coma. He had suffered a severe head injury when a piece of burning debris came down on him. He was in the hospital but truth be told I was afraid to go see him for fear of further retribution from Tom. I hated myself for it and so did my former coworkers. I told them that I couldn't face him like that. What else was I going to say, my crazy ex-whatever-he-was burned down the cafe and I'm afraid if I have anything more to do with him Tom would surely kill him. Tom had succeeded in making my life miserable and it didn't even take him that long.

" Ginny I really hope your friend is going to be ok but you can't sulk here for the rest of the summer." Pansy said for the thousandth time. It has been 3 days since the fire and I haven't left the apartment once.

"Pansy" I said trying to find the right words. I knew I had to say what I was about to say. I just wanted to make sure I wouldn't regret them. This got too serious too fast.

" I ... I want...No I think I need to go home. " I couldn't meet her gaze after all that she has done for me I felt like I was betraying her.

" I'm just so torn, conflicted...it's to hard, this was a wake up call for me. I just need to take a step back. I was always going to have to go home before school anyway. I just need time...distance. Once school starts again, now that all of you guys wont be there I'll be able to clear my head, away from influence." I was digging my nails into the skin around my cuticles, I finally looked up at her.

" He's not going to like that." She said In a whisper

" I don't care, I'll be with the order. He won't be able to get near me until I'm at by then I hope to have my head on he broke things off with me not the other way around."

" He just won't like that he can't check up on you."

"Well we can't always get what we want." I said, trying to sound more confident then I felt. Tom had a to tendency always get what he wanted.

Pansy looked like she was going to say something, but then thought better of it. I had a good idea what she was thinking. This was a risky move but I'll be with the order.

" Obviously I don't want you to go but I do understand. What should I tell the others, or him if he asks"

" Tell them I need to clear my head. And that he is a jerk and an ass." I replied.

"Ok leave out the jerk ass part." I added.

" When are you going to go?" Pansy asked.

" As soon as I can pack, I don't want a chance to change my mind."

Pansy sat on the bed while I packed, I wouldn't look at her or engage her in conversation. My resolve was on thin ice. I needed to leave and I needed to do it fast. I didn't want to be talked out of it. I was finished packing when I realized that my family was in hiding, I didn't know how to find them but I knew I could get a letter out.

" Bye Pansy, Thank you for everything. I wish I wasn't going to be alone at school next year. Its going to be so boring." I said as I was waiting for my port key to take me to wherever Charlie was going to meet me to take me to the burrow.

" You know you don't have to go back... To school I mean."

"Yes I do, I want to graduate. I want to be a healer, I have to."

" Just a Ginny I hate goodbyes. I hope you come back to us soon." She gave me a hug and promptly left. Pansy wasn't one for emotions. The battered old wallet that was to serve as my port key started glowing. With a sigh I looked around the room, grabbed my bags and held on tight. I felt the familiar pull behind my navel and we sucked into a spiral of blurry images. Finally felt my feet slam into the ground, I lost my footing and fell hard on my butt.

" Graceful as ever Ginny."

"Charlie!" I yelled as I pulled myself to my feet and ran to him. I guess I didn't realize how much I had missed my family.

" How was your trip, why did you come home early?"

" Oh um It was great! Luna and her father uh decided to."

" Hunt rackspurts in Iceland." Charlie finished. He looked so much like dad. His arms were crossed, his eyes were hard. I was caught. But how much did he know? I don't want to give anything away if he doesn't know the whole truth.

" I know you weren't with them. I don't know where you were or why you lied but you are going to do allot of explaining on our walk to the burrow or I will tell mom and dad."

I was trapped, I didn't know where to start. I should had come up with what to say if I got caught. I looked around to figure out where we were, picked a direction and started walking.

" Aww no you don't." Charlie said grabbing my elbow and turning me around.

" Leave me alone Charlie, I'm not a child." I said yanking my arm back, his grip was strong, that was going to bruise.

" This isn't a time for games Ginny. I know you want your freedom but in case you haven't noticed we are at war."

" I am well aware of what has been going on, believe me, I'm not worried about Death Eaters."

" What's that supposed to mean? Of course you should be worried about death eaters, and while we are at it, those new friends of yours have strong ties to them if they aren't branded themselves already."

" I'm not worried about the death eaters." I repeated before turning on my heel, whipping my hair in Charlie's face for dramatic affect. Charlie grabbed my arm again.

" Everyone should be afraid of them." The look in Charlie's eye flashed with anger then turned to fear as I stared back at him. Gradually his face seemed to change, as if a thought had just dawned on him. I think I said too much, Charlie and I had always been close despite the large age gap. He knew the extent of the things that transpired in my first year, and the affects they had on me. He also knew that the only way I wouldn't be afraid of them, is if I was ordered not to be harmed, that order only comes from one person.

After it happened I went to a therapist for a few years, they explained that it is not uncommon for victims to fall for their aggressors, that Tom had preyed on my vulnerability and that wasn't my fault, it took me a long time to figure out that this wasn't true in my case. I loved him, thats when I decided to live the way I wanted to. But I still love my family, I feel as though I am walking on the edge of a razor, ready to fall at any moment, the only question is, which way would I fall.

After what seemed liked hours, Charlie finally spoke.

" I though you were over that Ginevra" Uh oh, Charlie never used my full name, I was in trouble now.

" I'm sure I don't know what you are talking about."

" Ginny, I love you, We all love you. We ... If he came after you again we ... we can protect you."

" Stay out of my business Charlie. Please, just let this go. I want to go home." We stared at each other for a moment. I knew what I had to do. I took a deep breath and closed my eyes. When I opened them I let my lip quiver and a tear slip down my face.

" I made a mistake Charlie, But I'm here now and I want to go home." I was always a master manipulator, Thats why Tom and I made such a lethal pair.

" Gin, Don't cry please. I won't say anything. Just do me a favor and go back to Dr. Karington."

" I will. I promise" I said wiping away the tears from my cheeks. Maybe it would be good for me. I mean, I had left so I could get over Tom, I don't plan on going back, I just really didn't want Charlie to stir up any trouble, we already had enough of that going around. Charlie put his arms around me, picked up my bag and steered me towards home. Home... The thought of seeing my home and family filled my heart with joy, Maybe there was still hope for me.

I stood outside the two story brick office building staring up at the third window from the left, Where I knew Dr. Karington was seeing her 10 oclock patient, where I knew the over talkative twenty something bottle blonde was snapping her gum, answering the phone and typing crap into her portable phone.

I spent a year in therapy here after my first year, When I left I had no intention of coming back. I had been putting this off all summer, until finally Charlie made the appointment for me. I know I need this, she helped me once she can help me again. Only if I am truthful though, I need help getting over him. Do I want to get over him?

" Go ginny, One foot in front of the other." I said out loud to myself.

After another 10 mins of scolding myself I finally made it into the office. I was right, Little miss bottle blonde was still here. The place looked exactly the same. I am pulled out of my thoughts by someone calling my name.

" Ginny, Come on in" I look up to see Dr. Karington holding open the door to her office. She also looked the same, maybe a few more wrinkles around the eyes. Same shoulder length brown hair with a few more greys then I remember. She was wearing a pair of black slacks, red blouse with a really cute belt if I'm being honest. I gather my purse, give a small smile and follow her into the small office.

There were so many diplomas on the wall I doubt she had any sort of social life at all. The mahogany desk, computer, and several serenity, hippie, calming sayings were still displayed on the wall behind the sofa. I noticed she did move her book case full of self help and psychiatry books to the corner by the door. As I looked around the room my eyes fell on the familiar sight of my file on her desk. A folder with W-E-A , G in colored stickers on the side, It was thick, I wonder if everyones was like that.

" Please, Sit Ginny." Dr. Karington motioned to the couch as she took her seat across from it, put on her rimless glasses and poised her pen in her hand over her notebook. I sat.

" So Ginny, Its been awhile. How are you ?"

" Uh yea, I'm good. Things are ... good"

" Well this is the first time I've seen you in years. There must be a reason why your back. I've been reviewing your file, You had PTDS from an episode in your first year of school. Are you having nightmares again ?"

" No, no nightmares. I'm not a child anymore."

" So you have been able to keep thoughts of Tom at bay."

" Yes and no." I said nervously.

" Can you elaborate?"

" Um well, He's back ... now and not just in my head or in my diary." The best part of seeing Dr. Karington was that she was a witch herself, she just happened to practice a muggle profession so I didn't have to fudge anything for muggle ears.

" I thought we worked at great length to separate the Tom you knew from He who must not be named."

" Yea well we did, But thats just it now. He is him, they are one now. I don't know how it happened but he looks like that again."

" And he sought you out?" She prompted.

" Not exactly. I wanted to see if it was true, What I heard about his new self. I found myself hanging out with children of death eaters."

" Seeking out inappropriate company Ginny we talked about that."

"Yes, Yes I know. I sought them out, They were the best chance I had at getting to him. But they actually turned out to be really good friends."

" Because you got what you wanted from them."

" Because they were there when nobody else was" I said defensively.

" Why do you think you sought him out again?"

" I... I wanted to see him OK, I'm not a child anymore and so I thought ..." I trailed off.

" You wanted him to see you now. He was the only boy who ever told you that you were pretty and that you would grow into a beautiful women." She said reading out of my file. I got very defensive when I saw her do that.

" Don't use my own words against me!"

" Those where his words though Ginny. You are doing it again. You are looking for validation from the wrong people. You are beautiful, smart and talented. Will you only believe that if it comes from Tom?"

" I...I don't know."

" Ginny why don't you tell me what you do know, you obviously decided you needed my help." I didn't respond

" Let me ask you this, Where you intimate with him?" It was blunt and direct, I'm not sure why but this surprised me.

" Yes"

" Did you let him use you?"

"Yes"

"And..." She prodded me to continue.

" Ok, I'll lay it out for you. Though a series of events I found myself in a sort of ... relationship- ish thing with Tom. It was great at first but I realized that I didn't want to be with someone who couldn't ... just be with me."

" You realized that you wanted more then what he could offer you. There is no shame in that Ginny you deserve to be with someone who can give you what you want."

" I know, It turned into a huge fight because as much as I didn't want to admit it, I do want marriage and children. That is something I know he can't give me."

"So you came home"

"Yes I realized the danger I was in. I know Tom is not stable. At first I thought that because he broke it off that I could ... Just move on but" I trailed off.

"Has he attacked you?"

" No, well yes, He came after a boy I went on one date with. I didn't understand because officially he is the one who left me."

" Did you care about this boy you went out with?"

I thought for a minute. " No, No I didn't. I just wanted to..."

" Make him jealous." Dr. Kerington finished.

" Yes, How stupid is that! I know he is not a normal man, How could I let myself think that making him jealous was a good idea." I put my head in my hands.

"You have a pattern of self destructive behavior."

"But why? Why do I do that?"

" Because Tom was, Is, a master manipulator and he made you feel like you needed him and not the other way around. We need to work on self worth. You need to not look for validation in others." I ran a hand through my hair.

" Your right. I can't believe I let myself get here again. I feel like I am on the edge and I don't know which way to go or even which way I want to go. I love my family but why can't I leave him alone."

" Because your first experience with a boy was with him. You don't know anything different because Harry never returned your affections, Tom did." I saw her look over my head at the clock on the wall. An hour goes fast.

" Times up?" I asked

" For this week. I think we should resume a once a week schedule. Now, for homework I want you to write down five things that you want for your future and why Tom can't give them to you."

" Oh,Ok. Thank you."

" Ill see you next week Ginny. Take care." She said as she walked me out. Her next patient was just checking in when I left. As I walked out of the office I made a commitment to do my best to work through this. It is so unfair that I am struggling so much and Tom can just move right on with his life. Fucking men, I thought as I took a cleansing breath and started to walk home.

Tom's POV

" He has been ruthless lately" I hear a nameless death eater say as I approach the meeting room.

" It's the Weasley Girl. She hasn't been around. Maybe she was a little more then just someone to ...uh entertain him." My blood boils as I hear them talk about Ginny. Just the mention of her name sets me on edge let alone them speaking of her this way. I should go hex them to hell. I think as my hand twitches towards my wand. I whip around the corner and glare right at them.

" If I ever hear you speak of her that way again I will make you regret you where ever born. Now get inside and do not speak for the rest of the night." The mumble a yes my lord and hasten into the meeting room.

I have called a progress meeting. I hate these but they are necessary. For the next hour I will have my leaders come up one by one and give me the status on the ministry, Hogwarts, and all the wizarding villages across Europe that I have stationed my followers.

" Hogwarts" I yell as I wait for Severus to approach the podium. I have made several staff changes for the coming new year. No pureblood student has a choice anymore about attending.

" My Lord, We have removed the muggle studies teacher and disposed of her. We are working on rewriting the curriculum to better suit our cause. The Carrows have been in charge of discipline but our vetting process to name the new prefects is not at all going well. Most of the students who would be most effective have graduated. Malfoy, Parkinson, Flint, Zabinni. We are considering...with your permission of course of reinstating the inquisitorial squad."

I furrowed my eyebrows, thinking hard. If there was nobody to be prefect, who was gonna be on the squad?

" You want to send them back? To patrol the school?"

" Thats what we had hoped my lord, they are not on assignment right now."

" I'll think about it. Go, get out all of you, this meeting is over." I yelled with a wave of my hand. I sat there in the empty room pinching the bridge of my nose to try and dull the pain from the headache I was getting.

" Not you Ms. Parkinson, I need to speak with you a moment." They all hesitated.

" Just Ms. Parkinson !" I growled, In no mood to deal with all of them together. I hate commiserating with teenagers, Why don't they just grow up.

Parkinson made a nodding gesture to the door, silently telling them to get the fuck out before I got even more annoyed. Then she slowly walked over to where I was sitting.

" Where is she ?" I asked. " And don't bother pretending you don't know who I mean."

" She uh... Went home my Lord."

" Home ?"

" Yes Sir to her parents." She wouldn't meet my gaze, I couldn't blame her not many people dare to.

" Did she give reasons?"

" Well she said she would have had to go before school started back up anyway and that she was hoping to get a littler clarity."

" Clarity ? What the fuck does she mean by that?" I asked more to myself them Parkinson.

"All I really know is that she was very upset, She left in a hurry." I thought for a moment. Now I really needed someone to keep an eye on her, she will regret leaving and If she steps out of line...I'll know it.

"Ms. Parkinson, I have a mission for you..."


	12. What a girl wants

_**** I just got back from the Wizarding world of Harry Potter in Orlando ! So crowded but amazing ! I drank butterbeer and pumpkin juice, and got a chocolate frog ! Totally Geeked out ... Oh and I got engaged in DisneyWorld ! so sorry the huge delay. _

Chapter 11

What a girl wants

Ginny's POV

"Well, I think I'll take a nap" I say hoping to get this annoying girl to quit talking to me. We have been on the train back to school for almost an hour, she has not stopped talking since she sat down.

Her name is Avielle, a transfer from some school in America but I don't know if I believe her because her accent sounds fake. I've never really spent allot of time with anyone from America but I swear this girl sounds British. Anyway who the hell transfers in their last year of school? Whatever, I think she tried to explain but by that time I was tuning her out completely. I am so not in the market for new friends although I should be ,I am here alone, I quit hanging out with all my friends that were my age to hang out with the Slytherins. I cannot stand the thought of trying to reconnect with those airheads.

I lean my head on the window and close my eyes. I miss him, I miss him so much. I am almost certain that I will forget everything I have learned from my therapist over the past few weeks. Without continuing to see her throughout the year I don't know if I can stay strong. I think I just need a new interest. I would like a guy but I don't think I want to chance putting him in danger like Andre.

At some point I must have fallen asleep because the next thing I know the new bubbly blonde is shaking me awake. I look out the window and see we have made it to school. I feel so tired I don't even want to go to the feast. I just want to settle back into my room, I was told over the summer I would be reprising my role as head girl, Fine with me I can push all the associated work off onto the prefects and have some privacy.

After all the stupid little first years and Avielle ( seriously who transfers in their last year?) are sorted and we eat it is finally time to go to bed. The prefects take the new students to the their common rooms. Avielle to my great annoyance is sorted into Gryffindor and starts tailing me.

" Avielle" say turning around abruptly one step above her.

"You have to go to the common room. I'm head girl, I have my own room."

" Can't I see it?"

Hell no I think to myself, I cannot have her annoying ass knowing where my room is.

" Not tonight, I'll see you in class tomorrow." I say leaving her there. When did I become such a bitch? Maybe I was one all along and I'm just know acting myself. I like the thought of that.

I settle myself in the room and can't help but remember all the times Tom came to me in this room. I sigh heavily and flop on the bed and stare up at the ceiling for what seems like hours.

I miss him damn it. I almost can't stand it. When I go to sleep I dream of him. Of his eyes, of his quick wit, of his lips, his hands and the way he would touch me. I never had that before and don't think I will ever again. I mean something that good can only be once in a lifetime. The chemistry we had was just, I don't even know and now I've lost him.

My days are tedious. I don't want to learn this crap, I thought I did. It just doesn't seem that important to me anymore. I just feel like I am crawling out of my skin. I don't feel like myself and I hate it. I thought I would feel better here.

"Ginny,Ginny" I here from behind me as I make my way towards the great hall for lunch, I know who it is before I even turn around.

" Hello, Avielle." I said through gritted teeth

" Are you going to lunch?"

Duh, I think. "yes"

"I'll go with you. I haven't talked to you in ages." You were up my butt last night at dinner, you twit.

As we ate she babbled on and on. I picked at my food, not having much of an appetite.

" Ginny, I know that we haven't known each other that long but are you ok?"

" What do you mean?"

" Well,you just aren't very sociable, you hardly ever eat and you spend allot of time in your room."

" I well... I appreciate your concern I just have allot on my mind. I just went through a really bad breakup."

" Oh I'm sorry. Does he go to school here?"

" No, He uh lives in Ireland. I spend summers there ever since I was a kid. I've known him a long time."

" Do you mind if I ask why you broke up?"

" Uh, Its complicated but lets just say our lives were taking us in different directions."

" I'm sorry Ginny, Look I didn't mean to pry or to annoy you. I just, well I'm here if you need to talk."

" Thanks, I...I am sorry if I have been rude. I'm just...shattered. Damaged. Have been for a long time. With that I excuse myself not wanting to elaborate.

_ Tom's POV_

" Damaged?" What does she mean by that?

"I'm not sure My Lord." Avielle responded. She had been spying on me for a few weeks now. I just wanted to be able to keep an eye on Ginny. As I look at the young girl nervously shifting her weight from on foot to the other, her features were gradually turning back to Parkinson as the polyjuice potion wore off.

" Has she dated anyone?"

" You don't understand, She doesn't do much of anything. She just really is not herself. She is withdrawn, She hates me being around her, she hardly even eats. I am worried about her."

" She won't eat?"

" No, My Lord, She looks thin, tired and stressed all the time. I don't know what to do for her. I think there is only one...person...who c..could fix this." She says nervously.

" She doesn't know what she wants. You can go." I sat down in the chair by the fireplace with a glass of fire whiskey. What is she doing to herself? I never wanted to feel this way about anyone. I don't need this aggravation but I find I can't stop myself. Perhaps I should bring her back to the manor. Obviously we function better together then apart. I yell for a house elf to tell Lucius to have Snape sneak her a sleeping potion and bring her to the manor along with her stuff. I make people miserable every day, why can't I stand to have her be miserable, What is different about her? I'm not sure but I guess the least I can do is try to find out.

_Ginny's POV_

I'm sprawled out on my bed after the most restful nights sleep in weeks. I cuddle into the covers and turned over a few times. Stretching my arms and legs I smile feeling Hopeful that the day will be better then all the others. For some unexplained reason I feel content, hopeful and happy. Almost as if I had taken a calming draught. Happy is not really a word that has been in my vocabulary recently. I don't know what time it is, I hope its still really early because I don't want to get up. I never want to get up, my therapist would have my head if she knew I was acting like this. I wish I was stronger. I suddenly realize I have to pee really bad so I groan and open my eyes because I know I won't be able to go back to sleep with a full bladder. I put my feet on the ground and finally open my eyes as I put my hair in a messy bun. I drop my arms in a huff when I realize that I am not at school but in my old room at Malfoy manner.

" Uh Tom I don't think I can take much more of your mind games." I whisper out loud before going to the bathroom. I don't know why he brought me here and I am too emotionally drained to care. He must have giving me a calming potion as well as sleeping because I literally feel the happiness slipping away. It's a terrible felling, you are happy, even though you don't know why. Then the next moment all of that slips away and your thoughts are your own again.

I decided to take a bath and let the emotions take over me. While I was crying in the tub I came to a decision that I would make myself numb to Tom and whatever it was he was going to say or do. I will not become any more emotionally invested than I already was.

I relish in the warm water and the vanilla scented bubble bath. I slowly let myself slip under the water, I used to do this when I was little, I liked when I would come up and the bubbles would be all over my head, I was kind of a stupid kid, It didn't really take much to amuse me. I resurface and dip down a few times, I am about to come up again after testing my lung capacity and finding I can hold my breath allot longer then I thought I could when I am pulled roughly out by my left arm.

" Ouch, What the hell"

"Get out"

" Wait, stop, your hurting me." I yell as I scramble to my feet, A towel is roughly wrapped around me as I am flung over a should and carried into the bed room.

" What is your problem" I yell as Tom drops me on the bed.

" Get dressed, I'll wait." He said as he sat down on the window seat.

" You are such an ass hole." I say wrapping the towel around me and going to the dresser. Its inexplicably filled with my stuff. I pull on a pair of jeans and a tee shirt then go to style my hair and do my makeup, making sure to take my time, I know the longer I make him wait the madder he will get.

To my surprise he doesn't come barging in so I take one last cleansing breath and exit the bathroom.

" Happy?" I say gesturing to my outfit. He thinks I don't notice his eyes moving over my body before he curtly replies " Took you long enough"

" I can't win with you" I say sitting on the chair opposite him and crossing my legs. "Why am I here?"

" Because I hear you are not taking care of yourself." He waved his wand and I could feel my glamour spells melt away. I had gotten very good at charming away the dark circles under my eyes and my unwashed hair.

" You hear? from who?"

" Yes, I hear, I hear from my source. I had hoped my Ginny wouldn't be so stupid but I can see you have stopped caring for yourself." The intensity of his stare made me feel small. I shifted uncomfortably in my seat.

" Don't call me that, I am not your Ginny per your request. I'm moving on."

" But you aren't though are you? You're wallowing."

" So what, Let me process. Eventually I will get over you." I could feel my anger rising.

" What if I don't want you to get over me?"

" To many ifs in that sentence Tom, don't go there."

" You look unhealthy." He says Ignoring my last remark.

" I'm fine. Anyway my health is no longer your concern."

" You will always be my concern."

" No Tom, No. You can't do this to me. Its not fair. I deserve a life, I deserve all the things I want. You cannot or will not give them to me. I am not settling. So talk all you want but I am an open drain."

" What the hell does that mean? Open drain?"

" It means that anything you say runs right down the drain, I will not listen, I will not respond. I will no longer engage you in any way."

" Oh sure, I bet I can get you to engage." He said slowly raking his eyes over her body. Ididn't look at him when he got up and made his way over to me. He pulls me up and starts running his hands all over me as he starts kissing my neck. I melt into him for a moment until I feel myself coming to my senses. I push him away and walk across the room, increasing the space between us.

" You can't do this to me, I want things you can't give me."

He slowly walks towards me again, I move backwards until I feel the wall behind me. I avert my eyes from his intense gaze. He hooks a finger under my chin making me look at him.

" What is it you want?" I don't answer I am afraid I will say "you". With him being so close I find myself responding to him physically. His hands run down my neck, across my shoulders and down my arms. He takes hold of my left hand and pins the right about my head when I try to push him away. Lacing his fingers with mine he lifts our linked hands to my line of sight. Running his thumb over my knuckles he begins playing with my fingers.

" You want a husband" Still I don't answer, I follow his gaze, I look at my hand, try to imagine a gold band on my ring finger and wonder if he is thinking the same. He drops my hand and slides his down my neck, over my chest to my stomach.

"You want to have a baby" He says slipping a hand under my shirt to trace circles on my skin. I stay silent, I couldn't talk if I wanted to, I don't know what to say.

"I see it, you know" He pauses and moves his eyes to meet mine.

"I never have before, I see you pregnant with my child." My mouth goes dry at the thought. I have to remind myself who he is. A master manipulator who will say anything to get what he wants.

" Isn't that what you want?" His hand thats holding mine above my head tightens when I don't answer.

" I did" I whisper. He raises an eyebrow to that.

" Not anymore?"

" No, because I know that is not what you want."

" I just told you I see it."

" You don't have the gift of foresight Tom, Just because you can picture it does not make it so."

" What if I said I would give you a child?"

" Stop, I can't do this. Please, stop, it hurts to much." I say tears forming in my eyes.

" What hurts? I just said I would give you what you want." He's getting angry, I can tell by the aggressiveness in his tone.

" Realizing that I don't mean anything to you."

" What?" He releases me roughly. "How can you say that? "

" Realizing that I am just another person you can manipulate. Lie to and use for your own selfish motives."

" My own selfish motives, I just said I'd have a child with you."

" Yes, you did. For none of the right reasons. Just so you can try to make me stay. You think I will just have your child and agree to be the wife of someone who never wanted a wife or kid but just agreed so I will be available to you for sex on demand"

" You know you mean more to me, more then anyone else has in my life." He takes hold of my shoulders. " Why can't you see that." He says through gritted teeth as he shakes me roughly and pushed me back against the wall.

" You don't show it. Frankly I am not sure if I will ever be able to trust you. I have thought about this long and hard Tom. I need to go back to school and I need you to stay out of my life. We are no longer involved. Please let me go back and do not interfere with my life. I need to move on. If you cared about me, you would let me. Let me go"

The look in his eye is deadly. For the first time in a long time I am afraid to be around him. I realize my right hand is very close to the door, I reach out and try to turn the door knob but before I can he grabs my arm and has me pinned again to the wall.

" Please, let me be." I whisper, tears streaming down my cheeks. He leans in and kisses me roughly on the mouth before placing his lips so close to my ear that I can feel his breath tickle my skin, sending goosebumps over my body.

"No" He says quietly but no less threatening. Before I can respond he is gone. I sink to the floor in shock.

"If you loved me you would" I say to the empty room.


	13. Crazy

Chapter 12

Crazy

I count things now. I count everything and anything. Over and Over. The number of birds that fly past my window, the number of flowers on the bed spread, threads in the tassels of the pillows. Anything to pass the time. I haven't left this room in a week. I know what he's doing and I won't let him win.

Everyday is the same, I'm afraid my sanity is slipping away. I gave up on my wand, I spent my first day in here tearing the room apart. I knew that it wouldn't be in here but it gave me something to do.

An elf brings my food but is not willing or not allowed to speak to me. I refuse to say more then thank you, I will not give Tom the satisfaction of knowing that I am begging an elf to keep me company. This is so twisted, how did I end up here? I wish I had been strong enough to stay away. If I had followed through on my therapy she would have had enough time to get me to see sense.

I am so desperate for something to do I find myself doing the crazy yoga stuff Hermione was always going on about. It feels good to stretch. I do what I can remember, they all have crazy names like downward dog. It relaxes me and I find that Hermione was right about all of it. I twist and contort myself into crazy positions, making it up as I go along really but I don't want to become lethargic. I'm certain that is what he wants, deprive me of my freedom and any human contact and he thinks I will bend to his will. Don't hold your breath Tommy boy. What an infuriating wizard he is.

Admittedly, that could be one of the reasons I am so attracted to him. Dr. Kerington said I am singled minded to the point of recklessness and that I self sabotage. Honestly, I love sparing with him, I love wining an argument, I love that this intensely powerful wizard wants me, can act irrational because of me, I can make him want me and I am the only one who he regards with even the slightest bit of emotion. I suppose that makes me feel powerful, for once it makes me feel like I matter.

I could have so easily given in to him. He said he would marry me, he said he would give me a child and thats what I want. However I realize now that I deserve more, Dr. Kerington did manage to at least get me to see that. I do not want a husband who is distant and treats me as if I am in the way. I don't want my child to be born as a solution to a problem. A baby should never be born with a job, that is what Dr. Phil says. Tom just wanted to end the argument. When that didn't work, he locked me in this room.

I would love to have a telly here but I won't even ask because I know Tom will never allow such a muggle thing here. I started watching Dr. Phil with Hermione, She forced me to watch an episode on toxic relationships, hoping she could stop me from going after so many guys at school. She had no idea how inappropriate I was actually being. Dr. Kerington was impressed when I remembered that line from Dr. Phil and encouraged me to read one of his books, which I started but lost. Now I would give my right arm to have it.

On day 8, at least I think its day 8, I start to sing. Anything I can think of and loud. I don't know if anyone can here me, I never hear footsteps or voices so I think I must be in a wing on my own, or he cast a spell on the room, maybe even both. I sing at the top of my lungs any random song that comes to mind. After a while I'm so desperate I start on Christmas carols but I stop all together when I start thinking about my family and the possibility that I may still be here at Christmas.

Tears start to fall and I don't stop them. I'm breaking, I feel it but I can't stop. I guess I am not as strong as I thought. I have never been deprived like this before. I am used to a bunch of excessively affectionate, always in my business red heads. Over protective and over bearing. I suppose this is Tom's way of being over protective and over bearing but I miss someone telling me goodnight, or asking how my day was. I miss the sounds of other people talking and laughing. I especially miss the smell of food cooking. Whether it was at home or at school there were always heavenly smells wafting from the kitchen. That night I don't eat my dinner, I just cry.

I don't eat breakfast and I don't eat lunch. I don't feel it either, I think my sadness has numbed me, I feel no pangs of hunger. That scares me because it means my psychological state is now affecting me physically.

Tom's POV

"They know she is no longer in school my lord. They are going to start causing problems, we should take them out" Draco says with hardened eyes. He thinks I will take it out on him.

" They are not to be touched, I mean it. How did they find out?" I say walking slow circles around him like a shark circling its prey. I do have a flare for the dramatics.

" The Lovegood weirdo, Although she was somewhat estranged from Weasley, she was instructed to come home for good before Halloween and when she showed up without Ginny she told them that she thought she had already come home. Apparently Arthur sent Ginny a letter about them sicking together and coming home. I don't know where Ginny's mail has been going, if the owl couldn't find her at school he would have taken it back to the sender."

" You think I haven't thought of that?" I snap "its been coming here but I haven't been reading it. I'd been debating on if I should give it to her." I say more to myself then anyone else.

" Forgive me my lord but have you checked in on her since she has been back here?" My head snaps to look at Draco, He is crossing the line, what I do concerning the girl is none of his business.

" I know what I'm doing Draco. You can leave now" I pace for a while, I want to see her, but she will ask a million questions and I have no answers. All I know is that I want her here. After I pace the room, I pace the hallway outside of her door. Back and forth, I want to go in, I want to see her. I haven't seen her in almost 10 days, not even to spy. I can feel her in there. I can feel the intensity of her presence right through the wall. We could be amazing together so powerful, so passionate and so intense. I need to convince her that it will also be great for her.

I look up and down the hallway to make sure nobody will see the pathetic move I am about to make. Once I am sure I am alone I press me ear to her door. Its late, she is probably asleep. In my mind I can see her, Her red hair laid out on the silk pillow, her pale skin against the dark green of the bedspread. One leg will be completely out from under the covers and thrown across the other. She always sleeps like that. A strand of have will be undoubtably and irritatingly stuck to her lips from chewing it before she fell asleep. I hate it when she does that its gross and childish. Merlin, she is so annoying. I shake the visions out of my head when I realize there is a noise coming from the room.

At first it sounded like soft singing then I realized she was crying. This sad little whimper mixed with uncontrollable sniffling. Without a second thought I threw the door open, not thinking that it may scare her. When I first caught sight of her she had thrown herself off the bed in fear. Her eyes were red, she had been crying, hard and for a long time. Her hair was matted to her wet cheeks. Before I could say anything, realizing it was me she came running into my arms.

She is crying and rambling hysterically I have no idea what she is saying. I pick her up and carry her to the bed, when I set her down she wont let go of me. I stroke her hair to try to calm her.

"Shh Ginny, Ginny stop. It's OK, it's OK" She slowly starts calm, her breathing becomes normal again. I lift her head so I can see her face, summon a wash cloth and gently pat her forehead. Her cheeks are all flushed. We don't speak for a while, I clean her up, brush her hair and change her into her pajamas and settle into next to her.

"Tom I.."

"Shh" I cut her off. "Sleep love, we can talk tomorrow. You look like you haven't slept in days." She gives me a soft small smile, I can tell she has questions but is to tired to argue. I laugh to myself as she flings her right leg out from under the covers and across her left and puts a piece of hair in her mouth. Normally I would pull it out but I don't have the heart to tonight, for whatever reason, it calms her.

We sleep. The next morning I let her sleep. She looks so perfect in my arms. I send out a letter to my men detailing their missions and strict instructions not to bother us. We are going to figure this out today, I never want to see her like this again. If she decides to leave again, I will have to let her go. At least I'll have my missions to distract me. Merlin help the death eater that crosses me if she does leave.

I have the house elf bring us some breakfast so its waiting for her. I want to kiss her, I want to kiss her so bad, to wake her up and see her big beautiful brown eyes and make love to her. Finally she begins to stir.

" Tom, you're here" She says sleepily.

"Yes"

" Please don't leave me here" She says clawing at my arms.

" I won't, Come on, lets have breakfast and we can talk."

"No, I don't wanna get up." She says as she snuggles into the pillows. She is never like this. I turn her over so she can look at me. I lean down and plant a soft kiss on her lips. I missed the taste. It takes all my strength to pull back.

" Ginny...Ginny please."

We finally settle in to have breakfast, French Toast, I know it's her favorite.

" Tom, I'm sorry about ..."

"Don't Ginny, You have no reason to apologize, I need to. I handled this wrong. I was trying to figure this out and I couldn't deal with all the questions so I thought I would just keep you here."

" You didn't want to deal with me." Her eyes are brimming with tears.

" Ginny, I...uh damn it I want you. All of you, here with me and forever. I love you."

" I love you too. I think you know that."

" I do, but you feel bad about that and that is hard for me to deal with. You can't help who you love Ginny. I never had any intentions of ever falling in love."

" Well, so sorry to screw up your plans" She says her voice dripping with sarcasm and distain.

" Dam it Ginny will you stop being so defensive and talk to me. I am being very honest with you can you please do me the courtesy of doing the same."

" What do you want from me Tom?" She yells, the tears are streaming down her face now. I didn't want to make her cry.

" I told you I loved you. I told you what I wanted and you didn't reciprocate my feelings. You want me to admit that I feel like a horrible person for loving you. I do. I feel like a horrible person. I am betraying everyone I love. I started this with you again to piss them off. I never thought I would fall for you. But I did, hard. What you did to me this week should have been enough to make me stop but it hasn't."

" It hasn't?"

" No" She whispered. I get up from my seat and walk over to her. I wipe the tears from her perfect cheeks and take her hands.

" Marry me Ginny."

" What? Tom you said ..."

"Forget what I said. I tried that. I tried to live without you, now I know I can't."

"Well...what about all your... stuff"

" Ginny, Loving me means loving all of me, this is what I don't but I can promise you one thing, your family will not suffer at my hands or any of my death eaters who remain loyal."

"And...Uh.."

"Harry? Ginny if you have feelings for him then we cannot be together. I will not guarantee his safety in any way."

" I don't have any feelings for him. I did, I won't lie but that was over a long time ago. He has betrayed me and taken advantage of my feelings for him. He lost my respect."

"What do you mean? What did he do?"

"It doesn't matter."

"Then marry me, I want you. I don't just want you Ginny I need you. I can protect you. You know I will. I think that you share my beliefs a little more then you want to admit."

"Maybe thats true, I won't join your cause, I wont let you use me as a pawn to manipulate the public or to boost your morale. I will not be used."

"I know, I won't. Please marry me Ginny." She pauses for a moment. I can tell she is fighting with herself.

" I want to finish school."

"Of course, I'll get you tutors, you know that you won't be safe at Hogwarts. I won't use you as a pawn but that won't stop the other side from trying to." She is pacing now.

" Where...where would we live? I want to make a home for us Tom. This feels like a boarding house. I don't want to be around death eaters all the time."

" I'll take care of it. We can renovate a wing here. You can do whatever you like."

"I don't want to be alone all the time. You go away allot but will you realize that you have a home life now?"

"I will come home to you. Thats why I asked you to marry me." She closes her eyes and takes a deep breath. I can tell she has one more question, I don't want her to ask because I haven't come up with an answer. She opens her eyes, takes one more deep breath and gives away a hint of a smile and gives a little laugh.

"This is crazy" She says as she looks down at her feet and shakes her head. For a minute I think she is saying no. Then she looks up and smiles.

"OK" She says, Its hardly audible but its there.

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	14. Logistics

Chapter 13

Logistics

" Damn it Ginny will you stop. Your driving me crazy. The decision has been made so just sit down" She won't stop pacing back and forth. She just agreed to marry me, why can't we just enjoy the moment.

" Ginny please can we just enjoy this moment. I have cleared my whole day so I could ravage you and you are spoiling the mood"

" Tom, I just agreed to marry you, marry you. Do you understand what that means, what the hell am I gonna tell my parents?"

" Your parents are the last thing I want to be thinking of right now, we will figure it out. Now please get your cute ass over here I have something for you." She walks over to where I am sitting by the window, I pull her into my lap.

" I think I owe you a substantial piece of jewelry" I say pulling a ring box from my pocket. A smile lights up her face as she takes the box in her tiny hands.

"Open it" She slowly opens the box revealing the white gold band with an emerald I chose just for her. Its a square cut with a sailors knot design surrounding it.

" I thought a diamond would be to common for you." I take the ring out of the box and slide it on her finger.

"Its beautiful Tom" She is fighting back tears. I finally got her to be in the moment. When she said yes she started rattling off a million reasons not to do it.

I kiss her, I kiss her like I have never kissed her before. I cannot get enough of this women. I slide my tongue over hers, tasting her. She moans into my mouth as I slide my hand up her thigh. I can't wait any longer so I scope her up in my arms and carry her to the bed where I make love to her over and over until we both fall into a deep contented sleep.

I wake up and she is pacing again, I'm gonna have to get her some calming potions or a mood manipulator or something.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~Ginny's POV~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

" Tom we need to talk about things" I said chewing my thumb nail down to a nub.

" Why would we do such a thing?" He says. He doesn't want to discuss logistics but I don't care. We need to.

" We need a game plan, Like what to tell my parents, I have to withdrawal from school, and my parents, this is going to kill them." Tears are brimming my eyes.

" Ginny we will take care of it. I will make a formal announcement to my followers, You will go to school and gather the rest of your belongings. Severus will be your tutor. As for your parents... well ... you will have to go and confront them.

" Tom they will never understand, they will never let me leave."

" Ginny you need to take a stand, I will send someone with you that will be able to help. You may not have thought this through Gin but I have." He takes my hands and wipes a tear off my cheek.

"Who will go with me, Draco?"

"No, that won't help you, they will still think you are under the imperious curse."

"Then who?"

" Your brother, Percy"

" What?" I ask, my mouth going instantly dry.

"He's one of us, Has been for a while now. Shortly after he started working at the ministry he started to sympathize with our cause. As I understand it he is estranged from your family."

" Uh, yea we haven't spoke to him in a long time. He uh... well I guess it makes sense. I know he was starting to turn on Harry. Is he...I mean did he get..."

"Yes. Just a few months ago."

"Wow I need, I need to sit a sec." I go over and sit on the window seat while I try to process the information.

" So what I propose is that you take him to the house with you. Tell them what is going on, get anything you need if they let you and make a clean break. Its the only way they won't come after you. Any other way and they will assume you being coerced."

" Um ok. Yea that makes sense. When can I see percy ?"

"I'll have him come in the morning, I have a meeting so you two can talk. Its going to be OK Ginny. I will protect you, I've told you before I won't make your family a direct target."

"Thank you. It will be helpful to have Percy."

" I can't do this Percy." We are standing just outside the gate that leads to the Burrow. Percy doesn't have the permission to apperate directly into the house, My parents haven't trusted him for some time now. I do but I thought that a less dramatic entrance would be better.

"Do you want to do this ?" He asks

" Yes, I do. It feels more right then anything has in a long time."

" Then do it. You can't live for others anymore Gin. Its not fair to you." He puts his hands on my shoulders squaring me up so that I face him.

" Will they be upset, yes, Will they be mad, yes, will mom cry, yes but none of that matters if this is what you want. You love him ?"

" Yes, Percy, I do. It may sound crazy but I do." I say tears brimming.

"Then lets go."

Mom's in the kitchen cooking and dads in the living room when we come in the back door. Mom drops what she is doing as she runs to us, pulling us into tight hugs.

" Ginny Oh, sweet lord we have been worried sick."

"I'm fine mum" I say tightly

"Percy, Have you finally come to your senses?" Dad asks from the doorway of the kitchen.

" I never lost them father. Gin, your up." Before I can speak my mother chimes in.

" Ginny where have you been? How did you end up with Percy?"

" Glad your back Gin, Stay for supper Charlie will be here any minute" He says as he kisses the top of my head.

"Ginny" Percy prompts, he knows if he doesn't give me a push we may be here all night.

" I... I'm not staying. I just need to get my things and go." I say unable to meet their gaze.

" Go? Go where?"

" I just, well I need to start following my heart dad. I'm sorry this will hurt you but I'm going back with Percy."

"Back with Percy where exactly?"

" Father you know I won't answer that question. Ginny has decide for herself where she wants to be."

" You did this Percy, If you have messed with her head..."

"Nobody has messed with anything. This was her choice." He responds, his voice growing louder as the argument gets heated.

" This is from that mess in her first year, its got her all confused."

"Please do not speak about me as if I am not here." I say angrily.

" Ginny, your not in your right mind. We can have you looked at and get you back into therapy. "

"Stop it dad, Stop trying to handle me." I scream, clenching my fists and stamping my feet.

"Its him isn't it?" We all look over to the fireplace. In the argument nobody saw him come in.

" Ginny ...its him right, I knew it when you came home last summer." Mom bursts into tears when she realizes what Charlie means.

" Charlie this is what I am choosing. Please let me go." I stare him straight in the eye. My new found will power feels great as it courses through my body. I know what I am fighting for, who I am fighting for.

"Listen, I don't know why things happen the way they do but this is my life. I love him. I am only fighting for our love, not blood purity, not for power or control. I can keep you all safe, he has promised me that."

" Your love? Ginny Weasley how can you be so stupid, what makes you think that he will not use you and discard you." my mother starts screaming.

"I know him, I trust him. I am sorry this is hurting you but I have made my choice. I am tired of fighting part of myself, I am tired of being someone I am not. Truthfully I have never felt better in my life. This feels right." I walk past them all and up the stairs to my room. Right before I reach the door I realize my mother is behind me.

" Are you pregnant Gin? is he forcing you to do this? If you are we can protect you, we can hide you, you never have to go back we can..."

"I am not pregnant" I say cutting her off and pinning her with the fierce glare that I learned from her.

"How dare you, How dare you turn your back on this family, Harry and all that is right in the world."

"Don't you understand that I am fighting for what I think is right in this world" I say screaming right back at her, when the words are out of my mouth she slaps me hard on the cheek. She has never hit me before, I am so stunned I can't stop what happens next.

"You selfish, selfish girl I have raised you better then to throw your life away. If you are going to do this I'll be damned if I am going to let you take your things that your father and I struggled to buy you." With a flick of her wand, my bedroom door goes up in flames blasting it to pieces. By this time the family are all standing behind her.

" Goodbye mother. I love you, always will." I walk over to Percy and take his hand and apperate away from my family and the only home I've known except for Hogwarts.


End file.
